Dinozzo, let's party!

Schmeil Pinkhas

A zebra can't change its stripes but a woman can.

Miranda Pennebaker

Isn't Burt the most relaxing thing?


That TV came over on the Mayflower.


I've seen bad turn to good many times. You can't lose faith.


One gets over a watch. You never get over a loved one.


That sex offender website makes it damn hard to meet chics!

John Stevens

I appreciate that, Tony, but don't try to compete with my Schmeil.


Male friends only want to sleep with you. Billy Crystal, Meg Ryan, When Harry Met Sally.


No name, but Marge Simpson was a regular.


Agent Gibbs, you are one bad-ass!

Captain Wescott

Hey, the Opera is one of the big three!


NCIS Quotes

Tony: One other question, I know you're an expert in English history. And I was just wondering, have you ever heard of Archibald Drummond, the 17th Earl of Trent?
Ducky: The Earl of Trent. No, I can't say I have. Why?
Tony: I was just wondering. Thanks.

By the way, Gibbs. I like the new look.