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Ncis

Gibbs: You only take on cases which cross my path.
Hart: Don't flatter yourself.
Gibbs: You're standing in my house!

Ziva: What do you think Corporal Vega was doing at an empty warehouse?
Tony: I don't know. Why don't you pick the lock and find out?
Ziva: We do not have a warrant.
Tony: This building is foreclosed, which means it's owned by the bank, and since the people own the banks I think technically that means we own the building.
Ziva: Wow.

Ziva: What is that?
Tony: It's a Geiger counter. You can't be too careful.

I mean, sure, Tim, you're kids are going to be smart, but mine have a shot at being really beautiful.

Tony

McGee: I was there, too, near the car, you know.
Ziva: We all were.
McGee: But don't let that stop you from thinking about yourself.
Tony: This isn't about me! It's about my little DiNozzo makers! They've been nuked!
McGee: I know!
Tony: Do you?!

First the plague, now radiation poisoning. I'm starting to think someone really has it in for me.

Tony

McGee: Hey, in Paris, who got stuck with the couch?
Tony: Me. We flipped a coin.
McGee: Tough break.
Ziva: Why did you just lie to McGee?
Tony: Why did you lie to Nora?

Nora: You are so direct. So honest. So different from him.
Ziva: Tony and I have different approaches.
Nora: You're complimentary. You're sure you two never -
Ziva: No. Positive. Definitely no. Why do you keep on asking about Tony and I?
Nora: You're like me and Daniel. A good fit. Besides, Paris is a romantic city and you two shared a room, so I -
Ziva: I took the couch. Otherwise Tony would have whined the entire flight about his back.

Neeley: You have reason to believe they're on board?
Ziva: Stationary target. Closed quarters.
Neeley: A modern day Orient Express.
Ziva: The killer would just need an inconspicuous weapon.
Neeley: Like what? Listen, I've been doing this for a long while and I doubt that there's anything -
Ziva: Headphone cables make for a perfect garrote, and plastic silverware is not as safe as you might think. I once killed a man using a credit card.

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