Popular New Girl Quotes
Get rid of it, Jess. Pine has no place in this loft. It's the wood of poor people and outhouses.Schmidt
I'm not convinced I know how to read, I've just memorized a lot of words.Nick
The very fact that socks exist is proof shoes don't work.Cece
You my boo and I been missing you. I been missing you oh so long.Schmidt
Jess: I have to go out tonight, 'cause I'm feeling pretty twirly.
Schmidt: Twirly? Is that like horny?
Jess: I've got the dirty twirlies, Schmitdy!"
I'm gonna bake a cake so moist, girls are gonna be like, 'Ewww, why did you say moist? I hate that word?' and I'm gonna be like, 'Taste the cake!' And they're gonna be like, 'Damn, it's moist!'"Coach
Sarah: Do you and my Dad ever dry-lump?
Sarah: Have you ever done a 99?
Jess: I think that's a tax form?
Sarah: Have you ever given anyone a plow job?
Jess: I don't know....do you want to learn how to play Bridge?
Beans are nothing but soggy nuts!Schmidt
Ever since I've known you, you've been there. OK. You're always there. Even when I don't want you there, you're there. That's what a husband does. You fight for me. Thats what a husband does. You care about what I eat. That's what a husband does. You've cooked for me even when I don't ask. That's what a husband does. When I pass out you comb my hair so there's no knots in it. That's what a husband does. So guess what? You're gonna be a great husband to Cece cause you're a great husband to me.Nick
She's on a flip-phone. That means she's either poor, or a time traveler!Schmidt
Oh, this is terrible--she's quoting Scripture, but using a ton of cuss words.Nick
I'm gonna Biden his ass!Jess