New Girl

Tuesdays 9:00 PM on FOX
New girl
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So I'm not familiar with this term, 'finger guns.'

Prince

Prince is terrible at Frisbee.

Schmidt

Just drive the car. I gotta tell my girlfriend that I don't love her so she doesn't leave me.

Nick

You've never been turned on by gas mileage?

Coach

I'm in a limo! I wish I had really long legs so I could stretch 'em out the length of the limo!

Jess

Panty Hawk! I'd watch that show!

Coach

I'm pretty sure I'm having a heart attack, and I haven't arranged for anyone to clear my browser history. I wasn't building a bomb, I was just curious.

Nick

Jess: Have you guys been baking?
Coach: Aww, nah--a bakery downtown exploded, don't bother looking into it, it's not on the internet.

A lot of people never graduated high school! Einstein! Bill Gates! Anne Frank! I'm gonna take back that last one.

Schmidt

Nick: Do you know any time-consuming, free activities in Griffith Park?
Schmidt: Gross! Suicide?

I'm gonna bake a cake so moist, girls are gonna be like, 'Ewww, why did you say moist? I hate that word?' and I'm gonna be like, 'Taste the cake!' And they're gonna be like, 'Damn, it's moist!'"

Coach

You set fire to soda water. Who does that? How do you even possibly do that? It's not a flammable thing! It's not even...are you a witch?

Mike
Displaying quotes 85 - 96 of 553 in total

New Girl Quotes

I'm not convinced I know how to read, I've just memorized a lot of words.

Nick

I'm gonna bake a cake so moist, girls are gonna be like, 'Ewww, why did you say moist? I hate that word?' and I'm gonna be like, 'Taste the cake!' And they're gonna be like, 'Damn, it's moist!'"

Coach