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New-girl

Human dental dam!

Schmidt

Cease lovemaking! All lovemaking must cease!

Schmidt

I just got a treat, too. It's not candy. I'm not a dumb little baby like you.

Schmidt

My mom? You're going to tell me that my mom helped me with my public erections? I drew pictures!

Schmidt

Look at this puzzle. It's "ages 6 and up." You are "up," Winston. You are very "up."

Schmidt

And it was you, not Keaton, who told me that women aren't attracted to men who wear maternity pants?

Schmidt

Schmidt: No sig oths.
Cece: Just say "significant others."
Schmidt: Maybe you have that kind of time, but I'm on a tight sched.

Displaying quotes 25 - 31 of 31 in total

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New Girl Quotes

She's on a flip-phone. That means she's either poor, or a time traveler!

Schmidt

I'm gonna bake a cake so moist, girls are gonna be like, 'Ewww, why did you say moist? I hate that word?' and I'm gonna be like, 'Taste the cake!' And they're gonna be like, 'Damn, it's moist!'"

Coach
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