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Nurse-jackie

Don't ever say "ta-da." The only people that say "ta-da" are magicians or idiots.

Jackie Peyton

This job is wading through a storm of people, who come into this place on the worst days of their lives.

Jackie Peyton

It's never easy. If it does become easy, it's time to quit.

Jackie Peyton

Make me good, God. But not yet.

Jackie Peyton

I don't like chatty. I don't do chatty. I like quiet. Quiet and mean. Those are my people.

(voice-over) Watch and learn. Percocet should never be crushed, broken or chewed unless you want it to hit your system like a bolt of lightning. Which is only a problem if you're afraid of lightning which I am not.

Mrs. Akalitus: I have no choice but to initiate an internal investigation.
Jackie: I resent what you're insinuating. Why on earth would my nursing student flush a man's ear down the toilet?
Zoey: But I'm the one who found it.
Mrs. Akalitus: And there are firemen who set their own fires just to call them in.
Jackie: You know, you're not wrong. My uncle Gary torched a hobby store. But that was an insurance thing. Anyway, I hope you get the bottom of this.

Jackie: Okay, a quick hypothetical. What would happen to a student nurse if she got busted flushing a patient's body part down the toilet?
Dr. O'Hara: That's so sweet, trying to take my mind off things with your own naughty doings. Was it a penis?
Jackie: No, an ear. Don't ask.
Dr. O'Hara: And you blamed the new girl? Well done. Well, she's a student. She won't get fired. Anyway, if you want me for backup, you can always say I ordered her to flush it.

Percoset should never be crushed and chewed, unless you want it to hit your system like a bolt of lightening. Which is only a problem if you're afraid of lightening.

Jackie Peyton
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