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You seem depressed, even for prison. You know, if you ever want to talk about it, that's what counselors are for (laughs).


Alex: We were never friends, Piper.
Piper: We weren't?
Alex: No. Never. I loved you. I loved having sex with you.

You're laundry, I'm electric. We're from different worlds.


Oooh. Maria might be in labor. Could you Google symptoms? They're taking bets. If I guess closest to the birth time I could win a Twix.


Claudette: I look Michael Jackson.
Piper: No, I think you've got the wrong skintone. I look like Michael Jackson.

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