It must be hard, being locked up on Valentine's Day. That's all.

Fischer

There she is. Behind every strong man is a strong, c*nt-faced witch monster.

Healy

Man, they f*ckin' with us this way because they know our people's predisposition for hypertension.

Poussey

I couldn't help it. She was talking about wrestling...while crying.

Fischer

You just stood there while she attacked me and then you gave her new teeth.

Piper

Furlough is like the Loch Ness Monster. Much discussed but barely seen.

Healy

Red: Is that supposed to be comforting?
Piper: It probably would be comforting if Clive Owen were here to say it.

Cal: I was hoping you would have like a gnarly scar. Add character... and mystery.
Piper: There's still time.

Pennsatucky: Hey! What are y'all playin'?
Nicky: A game as old as time.
Pennsatucky: Cool. What's it called?
Nicky: Exclusion.

You're slutty, not easy. There's a difference, semantically.

Nicky

My friendship used to come with perks. Now I'm just an angry old Russian lady. Without the free pantyhose and eyeliner I'm not such a draw.

Red

Big Boo: Looks like you got yourself a pet kitten.
Piper: Oh I just want to put her in a bag of rocks and drop her in the river.