Leslie: I've seen you sketch things.
Mark: Uh, yeah. Like poles for stop signs.
Leslie: That everybody stops and looks at.
Mark: By law, Leslie. They're required to.

Ron: Hello Knope.
Leslie: Hello former strange person I used to friend. You're looking very Ron-like.
Ron: You have your same hair.
Leslie: No! I don't! I have bangs now!
Ron: I've never known what bangs are and I don't intend to learn!

Good idea! Gary had a good idea!

Leslie

Leslie: Ann's in trouble. We think it might be pills.
Mark: What?
Leslie: No. That's a lie. But this is just as important. We need you to look at a piece of art.

That painting is not gonna be destroyed. Every great work of art contains a message. And the message of this painting is get out of my way unless you want an arrow in your ass Marsha.

Leslie

There's a 30% chance they'll die.

Ben

Yes, the sky has land.

Ron

Andy: And I have my own TV show!
Announcer: Welcome back to the Johnny Awesome: Super Awesome Musical Explosion Show!

Leslie: People love voting for tragedy. Look at the Oscars! This is our Holocaust movie. This is our English Patient.
Ann: Sounds like you're exploiting the tragedy.
Leslie: See, Ann gets it.

That's what you see when you close your eyes at night Jerry. Topless Leslie glued to a horse!

Tom

And the Tommy Chopper. We sell chopped salad out of a decommissioned military helicopter. I'm a mogul now!

Tom

We lost a lot of good bread that day, as well as several human lives. And it also made the whole town smell like toast, which one resident described as quote, "disturbingly enticing."

Leslie

Parks & Rec Quotes

Leslie: I know you're not gay.
Tom: No, I'm not.
Leslie: But you're effeminate.
Tom: What?
Leslie: Well, you're wearing a peach shirt with a coiled snake on it.
Tom: That's because it was featured in Details magazine, and it's awesome.

Look, Tammy and I don't work. We are oil and water. Or oil and TNT and C4 and a detonator and a butane torch.

Ron