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Parks-and-recreation

I will leave my children $50 a piece. Enough for the cab ride home from the funeral and a steak dinner. End of discussion.

Ron

It appears that where #BitchBoss is clearly an indication of frustration #BossBitch is a term of endearment. Isn't language fun? It's like racquetball! For your mouth!

Chris

I think a lot of things. I like thinking. I also like racquetball.

Chris

Donna: Damnit Typhoon, why'd you do this?
Typhoon: Maybe if you bothered to come to my Great Gatsby brunch, you'd know!

Nadia: Wow, you are wearing a lot of moisturizer on your neck.
Tom: Best way to prevent crow's feet.
Nadia: Is this...glitter?

This will be blown way out of proportion! You have my word on that!

Jamm

Ron: The three most useless jobs in the world in order are: lawyer, congressman, and doctor.

I've had the same will since I was 8 years old. Upon my death, I will transfer all of my belongings to the man or animal who has killed me.

Ron

Ben: I'm pretty sure you're not supposed to have a weapon at work.
Ron: Literally, everything is a weapon. That folder in my hands is far deadlier than this bow in yours.

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