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Chris: What did you do for her?
Ron: Fixed her pothole.
Chris: Is that a euphemism?

Take the easy way out. I always do! It's easy!

Tom

Andy: Can we please make you into a princess?
Ron: No.
Andy: I think it would make Diane happy.
Ron: Why does that matter? Shut up.

Tom: Mmm. You can really taste the ignorance.
Councilman Milton: It's pronounced 'anchovies'.

Little girl 1: I'm a princess.
Little girl 2: I'm a mermaid.
Ron: I'm the director of Parks and Recreation.

Ann has told me repeatedly not to get a perm. But Ann's not here. While Ann's away, the mice get perms.

Leslie

Well, DDS doesn't stand for Dumb Dumb Stupid.

Tom

April: Are you busy? And writing Star Trek fan fiction doesn't count.
Ben: Haha. And I finished that last week.

Not only am I a city counselor, but I'm a city councilor with porpoise.

Leslie

I love this idea and I love me for thinking of it.

Chris

Councilman Jam: I'm gonna drop my liquids in here and drop my solids down the hall.
Leslie: Ew, no.
Councilman Jam: Okay. Your loss.
Leslie: How?

I am big enough to admit I am often inspired by myself.

Leslie
Displaying all 12 quotes

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Parks and Recreation Season 5 Episode 3 Quotes

Councilman Jam: I'm gonna drop my liquids in here and drop my solids down the hall.
Leslie: Ew, no.
Councilman Jam: Okay. Your loss.
Leslie: How?

I am big enough to admit I am often inspired by myself.

Leslie
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