Parks and Recreation

Thursdays 8:30 PM on NBC
Parks and recreation
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Leslie, have you seen Avatar? I never saw Avatar. I wanted to read the book first, but then I realized that there's no book version of Avatar. What'd you guys do for St. Patty's Day? I was wearing this T-shirt that said, "Kiss Me I'm Irish." But no one would kiss me.

Carl

Jerry: Anyway, hunting and fishing season is winding down, OK? And we all know that it is already closed season on twout. So now-I said twout instead of trout.
Donna: It happens to everyone.
Jerry: My marbles are full of mouth today.

Tom: You went on a vacation and you chose Muncie, Indiana?
Jerry: My wife and I have a timeshare.
Tom: In Muncie?!
Leslie: Tom, Muncie is a lovely city.

I always had fun with Andy. The problem is when you're his girlfriend, you're also his mother, and his maid, and his nurse. He's completely helpless. He's like a baby in a straightjacket. Ooo, baby in a straightjacket, that's a good band name. I should tell him that.

Ann

Jerry: I was walking Lord Sheldon.
April: Ew, is that code for some kind of weird sex act?
Jerry: Lord Sheldon is my dog. My wife named him.
April: Ew.

A schlemiel is the guy who spills soup at a fancy party. A schlamazel is the guy he spills it on. Jerry is both the schlemiel and the schlamazel of our office.

Ron

Donna: Maybe he fell into the toilet. Remember when he fell into the toilet?
April: Oh sorry guys, sorry I'm late. I got confused and took a shower after I got dressed 'cause I'm Jerry.

April: I thought Freddy Spaghetti OD'd.
Leslie: No, that's Mr. Funny Noodle. And he didn't OD; his drummer shot him.
April: Oh.

Scientifically hummingbirds are the world's cutest animals. I mean they're so small, they have tiny beaks and they only eat sugar water. I mean what beats that? Come on. Baby monkeys in diapers? Yeah, they do. Baby monkeys in diapers are cutest.

Leslie
Displaying quotes 13 - 21 of 21 in total

Parks and Recreation Season 2 Episode 19 Quotes

Ann: I watch a lot of Lifetime movies. There was this one, "How Far is Too Far Enough: The Terry Palaver Lonagan Story." This woman had agoraphobia and her therapist was obsessed with her. And he hid in her house, and then he attacked her and tried to eat her toes. Also, her daughter was having sex way too young. So yeah, free self defense class? I'm there.

April: I thought Freddy Spaghetti OD'd.
Leslie: No, that's Mr. Funny Noodle. And he didn't OD; his drummer shot him.
April: Oh.

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