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Leslie: Yeah, it's exciting-
Joan: Cut the chatter. Telehosting? Not as easy as it looks, OK? This isn't C-SPAN. This is Local Access 46.

I'm fix six and three-quarters.

Tom

Tom: Got enough leg room back there?
Detlef: Yeah, you don't have to sit so far up.
Tom: Yeah, I do.

I have to nap up. If I don't get a solid five, it kills my sunny disposition.

Ron

My nana, she used to say the best stuff. No work yourself into a lather. Look where it is and you'll find it. Don't put me in a home. Tell the truth and shame the devil. The devil knows where you're hiding. If you take enough rides with the devil pretty soon he's going to drive. She was really into the devil.

Leslie

Ann: As a nurse and as your friend, I highly suggest you don't try to stay up for the next 24 hours.
Leslie: I can definitely do it. I've already been up for 24 hours.

Tom: Does Pawnee Cable Access even have hair and makeup?
Leslie: Well, they have a communal lipstick in a box of combs.

Leslie: You're never going to believe who I got. People are going to freak out.
Tom: Rihanna.
Leslie: No.
Tom: Dr. Oz.
Leslie: Nope, you're never going to ask.
Tom: Justin Bieber.
Leslie: No. Ex-Indiana Pacer. Small forward Detlef Schrempf.
Tom: THE Detlef Schrempf?

I can't make it to the telethon tonight because I have no interest in being there.

Tom

Leslie: Can you get five eagles? No, get 10 eagles!
Mark: Leslie-
Leslie: No, you're right. It's your life. Give her as many eagles as you want.

Horseback. You should ask her on horseback. No, you should ask her in a hot air balloon. No, she should be on a hot air balloon and you should ride up on horseback. Oh, wait. She's in the balloon; you ride up on horseback. You point to the sky. Up there, skywriting. Marry me, Ann.

Leslie

Jerry: No, Leslie. Please. Tonight's kind of a big night. You know, all my kids are away...
Tom: Gross! No! That's Jerry's sex night. That ruins sex and tonight.

Displaying quotes 13 - 24 of 26 in total

Parks and Recreation Season 2 Episode 21 Quotes

Give a man a fish and you feed him for a day. Don't teach a man to fish, and you feed yourself. He's a grown man. Fishing's not that hard.

Ron

And it's important because Pawnee is the fourth fattest town in the U.S. It goes us, Dallas, Tulsa and certain parts of the Mall of America.

Leslie
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