Parks and Recreation Quotes
They'll only talk to you or me. And I can't go, because I don't want to.
Ron
They put a popcorn machine up there just to brighten things up, but they used the wrong kind of oil and a bunch of people had to get their throats replaced.
Leslie
Leslie: Look, if there's anything I can do to make it up to you.
Ron: Sure, how about you shoot me in the head. Oh wait, you already did that.
Tom: Man is the most dangerous game.
Donna: To the Predator.
Tom: I did smell something out there. And it wasn't human.
Leslie: That was pine trees.
Donna: The Predator can see heat.
Tom: We should cover ourselves in mud. It could still be out there.
Tom: Maybe Ron shot himself.
Leslie: Mmm, he has seemed really depressed lately.
Mark: He was shot in the back of the head.
Leslie: You're right. He loves the back of his head. He would never shoot himself there.
Ron: When I look at my palm I see a lady's mouth French kissing a dog. Is that normal?
Ann: Well, the pain medication I gave you is pretty strong. Donna uses it for menstrual cramps.
When you're out with the boys you've gotta be ready for a good pantsing. That's why I have suspenders that connect my bra to my jeans.
Leslie
Leslie: Ann, you ready to bag some birds?
Ann: Nope. But I am ready to relax by the fire and get my real simple magazine on.
Leslie: Well if you change your mind, you're now officially a licensed Indiana hunter.
Ann: Oh, gross.
And just like that. The one tiny aspect of government I enjoyed was clubbed to death before my eyes.
Ron
Leslie: You're literally listening to turkey calls.
Ron: Is this-is this not rap?
Leslie: Come on.
Ron, let's cut the bull. I want me, Tom and all the other ladies included on your hunting trip.
Leslie
Tom: Mark's not even in the department.
Mark: Neither is Ann.
Tom: But Ann's hot. And that counts for something.
