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Parks-and-recreation

The key to volunteering? A lot of pockets. For putting all the food in. The Red Cross has amazing cookies. I go there all the time. Meals on Wheels was a bonanza. Suicide Hotline? Surprisingly lame spread.

Andy

Ann: Man, this is tough.
Leslie: Yeah, but just think of all the kids that'll swing on this swing. Fat kids, skinny kids, brainiacs, sluts, the gay drama kids, goths, jocks, the alternative crowd.
Ann: Mmm hmm.

You can look at a problem and you can either go, "Oh, this is a problem." Or you can kaboom! Blow it up and turn it into something great. You literally kaboom the problem.

Keef

Well, we're here in Eagleton. It's two towns over. And we're all volunteering for KaBOOM!, a service organization that says it builds a playground in a day. I never trust anything that comes that quickly. That's why I don't eat minute rice.

Leslie

Tom: So, what does the Man Pillow look like?
Leslie: Daniel Craig. It's for my lower back.

Credit Card Rep: $20 to Netflix.
Leslie: Yup.
Credit Card Rep: $20 to Blockbuster Online.
Tom: Both?
Leslie: I needed all 11 discs of Gossip Girl at the same time.

I am gonna build that park myself. And it is gonna be awesome. And it's not gonna have a fountain shaped like Hugo Chavez's head spitting water all over everyone. Unless that's what the people want.

Leslie

Why don't you call the park after Chavez? You know you call it Hugo Chavez Park. You can have a nice, big fountain of his head so that when the water is coming out he's spitting at you all the time. You should write this down.

Raul

Leslie: Let's look at the pros and cons.
Ann: Pro, we can fill in the pit and build a park.
Leslie: Con, we might be filling it in with dirty money.
Tom: Pro, $35,000 worth of dirty money.
Leslie: Con, not quite sure why that's a pro.
Mark: We can fill in the pit.
Leslie: Con, Ann already said that. Pro and con never works.
Tom: Pro, yes it does.

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