Tom: What brand is it?
Ann: It's called "Womb, There It Is!"

Are you kidding me? Sell baby, sell! Could you imagine the Treat Yo'Self day we could have? It would be pedicures on top of pedicures on top of pedicures.


I had a small part in Argo. As well as the porn version, Our Goo.

Brandy Maxx

This case just remained interesting.


Together, as a town, we lost an amount of weight equal to 800 pregnant manatees.


Woah, Dylan, slow down. That sweat suit is not for sweating. If you take that crushed velvet on more than a brisk walk,it'll fall apart.


Due to a tragic misunderstanding, the prettiest pig beauty pageant has been replaced by a pork rib barbeque competition.


I'm boreddddd. Let's go have sex in a tree. He'll be back in 8 minutes.

Mona Lisa

I like the rain and the fish markets.


Your office shall serve as his monkey tomb!


I've been single for an hour now and it's the tits!

Mona Lisa

When you're not around, Tom drinks tap water.


Parks and Recreation Season 5 Quotes

Normally, if given the choice between doing something and doing nothing, I'll do nothing. But I will do something if it helps someone else do nothing. I'd work all night if it meant that nothing got done.


There's been a mistake. You've accidentally given me the food that my food eats.