(Discussing the retirement home 'fight club')
Dell: I don't believe this.
Dell's grandfather: We didn't mean for anyone to get hurt.
Dell: Yeah, then why did you hit each other?
Dell's grandfather: We had to do something. The days there... you can't tell one from another. Me... Nate... we were all going crazy.
Dell: You know, that part's obvious.

I think we just made a baby.

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Wow, this is so freaking cool, it's like... Rambo time! (he pauses) In... Inside my testicles.

</i> Jeffrey

(About Naomi)
Dell: Every time she walks away from you, she's miserable! And I care about how she feels, okay? I care.
Sam: Dell...
Dell: I know what you think, but this isn't just a crush. Okay? Maybe after so many years you just don't see it. You know how many women think like that, and, and look like that, and laugh like that, and care? One. So far I've met one. And yeah, she's... she's out of my league in every possible way, but I don't care. She... dazzles me. And I'm not stupid enough to hope that one day I'll meet someone like her when the time is right, because I won't. I love her. Okay? And I guarantee you, I wouldn't make her cry.
Sam: Okay, uh, Dell, I know that you're under a lot of stress right now, so I'm gonna pretend you didn't just say those things about my wife.
Dell: (pointedly) Ex-wife.

(To the recorder) Your wife is about to have a baby, Jack. So put down the Blackberry, stop sending Adam to do your dirty work and get over here. Got that, Jack...ass?

Cooper

Addison: Hey Pete.
Pete: Hey.
Addison: Have fun at your class!
Naomi: Have fun at your class...
Addison: I'm being a friend,OK? We're doing friendship.
Naomi: Yeah, I'm your friend and you never been that nice to me, ever.
Addison: We are adjusting, all right?

(Dell walks into Naomi's office at the end of the day)
Naomi: Oh, hi, Dell. What is...
(Dell grabs her coat)
Naomi: Oh, thank you.
(He helps her into it, then pushes her against the window, kissing her passionately. He stops. Naomi looks stunned)
Dell: I... I don't have it all together, okay? But I'm not a kid. I'm a man. Who loves you. Who's going to fight for you.

(Charlotte and Cooper are lying in bed after having sex)
Coop: So, are we dating?
Charlotte: If dirty sex on a regular basis is dating, then... yeah.
Coop: Okay, good... Does that mean I get to be on top?
Charlotte: Never.

Sex is best when you feel like you want to kill the other person.

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