Season 1, Episode 1: "The Pilot"
VIOLET: "What’s the matter, Cooper?"COOPER: "I don’t go to hookers, I don’t go to strip clubs. I meet women on the Internet. Who want to meet me. So I like them a little younger and a little dirtier. Is that wrong?"
• Rating: 8.0 / 10 • Permalink
NAOMI: "Addie, there are other options."
ADDISON: "Yeah, I know about the options."
NAOMI: "I'm so sorry. I know how much you wanted this."
ADDISON: "It's okay. I just, um, I just didn't realize that I was out of time."
• Rating: Unrated • Permalink
ADDISON: "I have a great guy, I don't have a baby, because I'm focusing on my career. Then I have the other guy and I don't have his baby because he's not the great guy. And now I don't have the great guy or the other guy and I'm finally ready to have a baby but I can't. That is so... exactly what my life is."
• Rating: 10.0 / 10 • Permalink
NAOMI: "There is no fertility potential here."
ADDISON: [sarcastically] "Ahh. Okay, this is good. This is um, this is just... perfect."
• Rating: Unrated • Permalink
ADDISON: "It's just, where I come from elevators tend to be this kind of aphrodisiac, you know? People get on them and they just get all horny."
• Rating: 10.0 / 10 • Permalink
SAM: "Hey...you want details, go see Naomi."
ADDISON: "She won't talk about it."
SAM: "Ah. Then you get no details."
ADDISON: "I'm on your side, you know that?"
SAM: "That's why you get no details."
ADDISON: "Details!"
SAM: "Woman, be quiet..."
ADDISON: "I even missed you."
• Rating: Unrated • Permalink
ADDISON: "Did you cheat?"
SAM: "Two things I learned back in kindergarten. One, keep your hands to yourself. Two, he who smelt it, dealt it."
ADDISON: "That makes no sense."
SAM: "Yeah... well, you cheated... you cheated on your husband with his best friend. There. Smelt it, dealt it. It works."
ADDISON: "You're using fart logic!"
• Rating: 10.0 / 10 • Permalink
SAM: "Ow!"
ADDISON: "Idiot – you divorced Naomi?"
SAM: "Just mind your own business."
ADDISON: [slaps Sam again]
SAM: "Ouch!"
ADDISON: "Moron. She’s my best friend."
SAM: "Stop hitting me on top of my head."
• Rating: 9.5 / 10 • Permalink
NAOMI: "You got fat."
ADDISON: "I did not!"
NAOMI: "Your hair is hideous."
ADDISON: "It is not!"
NAOMI: "And you're getting really, really ugly."
ADDISON: "Aww. I missed you too."
• Rating: 10.0 / 10 • Permalink
ADDISON: "You work with your ex-husband in a shrine for your ex-husband."
NAOMI: "It’s actually a good book. And we're friends. And we stayed friends after we divorced. It’s very healthy. We're healthy."
ADDISON: "What happened between you and Sam?"
NAOMI: "Addison, you and I were close in med school, but it was a long time ago."
ADDISON: "Oh, Naomi. Come on. You can’t stay mad at me forever. I know you."
• Rating: Unrated • Permalink
Total Quotes: 133
