Your mother had a hunch. I could gold-leaf my bathroom with what I made off my hunches.

Emerson

Do you ever shiver when you pee? That's how I felt when he spoke.

Ned

Chuck: I can't believe you didn't tell me you have brothers.
Ned: Half brothers.
Chuck: Two half brothers, which is like one whole one.

Olive: Here comes the center of the universe, pulling us all into her gravitational orbit of blame.
Chuck: Oh, well, FYI, um, there is no center of the universe because our universe is forever expanding.
Olive: Like your neediness. "Wah, respect my feelings. Wah, don't fence me in. Wah, don't treat me like I'm dead." Well, if you're so dead, how can you be needy? Oh right... you're selfish!

Olive: It's like we're trapped in a sachet in a panty drawer of a dead shut-in, who was shut in her bedroom by her cat so that it would have to smell the scene of Freesia. Can't you smell it?
Chuck: Yeah. That would be my Freesia hair detangler that you said smells amazing yesterday.
Olive: Wish I hadn't now.

Veronica: I want "Yustice" at any price.
Calista:: That's our kind of yustice. We'll be in touch.

Olive: Know what you want?
Calista: Yeah. Nothing', with a size of "buzz off."

The firm of Cod & Cod dedicated itself to the pursuit of truth at all costs... a pursuit young Emerson found "badass."

Narrator

Emerson: What got thee to a nunnery?
Olive: Oh, Emerson. You really want to know?
Emerson: Not especially. That was just my attempt at polite wee talk. Moment's passed, so let's talk compensation.

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