Olive: Water, H2O.
Lily: In other words for Vodka?
Vivian: Aah! Chlorine! Lily used to say it was like bottled sunshine
Lily: Now it reminds me about kids with bladder controll

Emerson: I'm a father.
Ned: As in a priest?
Emerson: As in a man... with a daughter.

We are giant, enormous idiots. And don't you say "gi-normous" because that ain't a word

Emerson

Ned: But do you hate me?
Chuck: I have to hate you a little, just for a little while. But I can’t do that if you stay
Ned: I don’t want you to hate me, I’ll stay.
Chuck: If you stay, I’ll just end up hating you more. Just go.

Coroner: My niece gave me this sweater.
Emerson: That thing’s uglier then a chipmunk’s ass.
Ned: He means the sweater, not your niece.

Olive Snook had been delivering pies for weeks, not realizing she was a homeopathic drug mule.

Narrator

Emerson: Why would somebody give somebody a Christmas sweater for Christmas? You can only wear it that day.
Ned: He means should. Only wear it that day.
Emerson: Yeah. Either you got to take off what you got on to put it on. Or you got wait another year for the next holiday season.
Coroner; Why are you going toe-to-toe with me on fashion?

Ned: Do you know you have a "tell" when you lie?
Olive: Do I?
Ned: You answer questions with questions.
Olive: Maybe I know I have a tell and I know you know I have a tell and maybe I'm doing it now to confuse you because you don't know what tell I'm telling.

Narrator: The facts were these: Abner Newsome was a happy child. For the first thirty-four seconds of his life.

The relationship between a father and his daughter is tenuous. It's very fragile. It could take a life time to sort out all the issues there. And what you think? You can just all "happily ever after" after just one minute? Man, you a dreamer.

Emerson

You don't have to do this, Madeleine. Please put the gun and the bat down. Or definitely the gun.

Ned

He's Lord of the Pies.

Chuck
Displaying quotes 1 - 12 of 164 in total

Pushing Daisies Season 1 Quotes

She read about people she could never be, on adventures she would never have. Life was good enough until one day it wasn't. Chuck wanted more. But at Boutique Travel Travel Boutique she got more than she bargained for.

Narrator

Chuck: Do you believe in reincarnation?
Emerson: Hell no. The planet's falling apart. Right now, it's the children's problem. We reincarnate, it's our problem

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