You know, my father never would have killed Varick if you weren't around. He fell in love with the idea that there was always gonna be someone there to save him from himself!

Paige

Terry! Come on in. Take your pants off.

Mickey

Terry: It's like Fatal Attraction. I bet she wasn't wearin' any panties.
Abby: [laughs] That was Basic Instinct.

Ray's just like my old man was with my mom. Too caught up with his own bullshit to realize how beautiful she was.

Terry

You're gonna need a criminal lawyer. Today.

Lee

Paige: Who do you think is more powerful in this town, you or Andrew Finney?
Ray: I don't know, why don't you go up there and find out? But tell the truth and get it all. Who knows, you play your cards right, you might even keep the team.

Ray: Where's the poker?
Cochran: What? You gonna shoot me now? Fuck yourself you Irish piece of shit.
Ray: [shoots him in the leg] Where's the poker?

Thank you, Ray. Boy. What a freak show that was. Has that chick ever heard of Invisalign?

Ed

Paige: Do you feel any differently?
Ray: What?
Paige: Now that you got everything you wanted?
Ray: No.
Paige: That's too bad.

Why couldn't you just play fuckin' bingo like a normal old man?

Mickey: They ain't gonna believe I'm senile, Ray.
Ray: Really? I don't think it's such a big stretch.
Mickey: Fuck you.

Mrs. Minassian, my father's a dipshit, he's always been a dipshit. Unfortunately there's nothing I can do about that. What I can do is offer to pay you back for any inconvenience he may have caused you.

Ray Donovan Quotes

Mickey: I got a good one for ya.
Bunchy: Dad, don't.
Stan: It's alright.
Mickey: What's the difference between acne and a priest? Acne waits until a boy's 14 to come on his face.

Well it's not going to lick itself.

Motel Owner