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Sam: No, no, no. We can't raise a baby!
Gladys: Any idiot can raise a baby, which makes you more than qualified

Gladys [about the baby]: Oh, an IBOH.
Sock: What's an IBOH?
Gladys: Intentional Birth Out of Hell. It happens. Souls have been known to escape from Hell to have their children here. Better schools

Ben: Take me and Nina.
Sock: Nope.
Ben: We're friends, but we have our sexual side.
Sock: Yeah.
Ben: But then we keep it it in a box and take it out when we need it. We enjoy it. We play with it. Then we put it back in the box when we're all done.
Sock: There is no box that contain this sexuality, Ben. All right. Uncontainable. That's how I was born. In fact, the delivery room doctor said I was the sexiest baby she'd ever seen

Mr. Oliver, I'm really really glad that you're alive and everything but... I just about had a heart attack. I think I might still be having one.

Sock

Dude, it's freezing in here. What the hell man? Hear that sound? That was my nipples crystallizing into diamonds on my chest

Sock [entering Sam's car]

Sam [about Morgan]: He's kind of the son of your boss
Gladys: So is Genghis Khan, you expect me to be impressed with a gap ad?

I'm gonna have sex with you in your natural body. Now, I would simply ask that you be careful that your wings don't poke me in the eye. Also, please be aware my skin is very sensitive, it chafes easily. Also, please don't talk while we're doing it. I mean, your demon vice is a little mannish, okay?

Ben [to Nina]

In truth, I have a small favor to ask and by favor I mean you don't have a choice

Devil

Devil: Now, I suggest that you grab that portrait tonight. If it stays there too long, Fitzgerald will show up and reclaim it, and more people will die.
Sam: Since when did you care if people got killed?
Devil: I don't. Good call.

Devil: You, on the other hand, are a conundrum. For all your whining and complaining, and lack of fashion sense, you always get the job done. You want to do the right thing. I hate that about you. But I guess that's the quality that makes you so effective.
Sam: Are you giving me a compliment?
Devil: No, mostly I just hate that about you

Am I detecting a little sibling rivalry here? Don't worry, Sammy, there's no real competition. I'm always going to like him a little better than I like you

Devil

Nina: I'm starting to like human food.
Ben: How is demon food different?
Nina: Usually it's still squirming.. or screaming

Displaying quotes 25 - 36 of 233 in total

Reaper Quotes

Hey, no shame in community college, K-Fed. I almost went

Sock

Sam [about the vessels]: Wait. So, they're not all little vacuums?
DMV Demon: The boss gives you the vessel he thinks you can handle. You must be a real moron