Rescue Me Quotes
The doctor said "you won," but I don't feel like I won anything!
Kelly
Mike: Her vagina. Was it like rank? Cause that happens to chicks, bro. That's why they invented the douche.
Sean: I thought they invented that so we'd have something to call you.
I'll tell you what I think. your wife has a vagina. Sheila has a vagina. Kelly has a vagina. Your daughters have vaginas. You are surrounded by vaginas on all sides, which is probably the reason why, I believe, you've grown one all on your own. Because you're no longer thinking with your cock, you're thinking with your vag. It's the only reason that makes sense because otherwise you would be banging beautiful Miss Kelly instead of heading into one of these emotional affairs with her, just like last year.
Lou
Why don't you get that Tom? I've got a funny feeling it's probably for you.
Lou
Everybody dies. Some die quick and easy. Some die quick and hard.
Tommy
There are no happy endings.
Tommy
Sean: Hey, you gonna try and bang her?
Mike: Nah, bro. I'm not in that mode right now.
Sean: Getting laid mode? I didn't realize there was a "not getting laid" mode.
Tommy: You talked to Derrick Jeter?
Kelly: I don't know. I guess. I asked Derrick Jeter to stop talking to me.
Tommy: You asked Derrick Jeter to stop talking to you?
Sean: She is so hot.
Mike: I know and she wears that tulip bodice like a princess.
Sean: What did you just say?
Tommy: What's wrong with Feinberg?
Needles: I think he might be Jewish.
Nobody talks about the downside about being a Mormon. Every guy wants two chicks at the same time till they turn on you. Next thing you know, you're standing in the kitchen with your dick in one hand and a multiple shopping list in the other.
Needles
That's the Tommy Gavin we know. You know, punch somebody in the face. That solves everything.
Shawn
