Scandal

Thursdays 9:00 PM on ABC
Scandal
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Cyrus: I'll give you exactly one second to get your feet off my desk.
Leo: Or what?
Cyrus: Or I'll cut 'em off and shove 'em down your throat.
Leo: I'm a size 11 1/2. I seriously doubt my feet would fit down my throat.
Cyrus: I'm not talking about your feet you baby-faced twit. I'm talking about your balls. Have they even dropped yet? Will you miss them when they're gone?

[to Fitz] You are stressed, and you are scared, and you want this. You want to win this election so bad you can't breathe, and I understand that. But you don't trust me.

Olivia

[to Olivia] You are not resigning. I refuse to accept your resignation. You can't leave me. I'm not losing you again.

Fitz

[to Harrison] Do you even know how to use it? The safety, and the clip, and how you're not supposed to tuck it in your waistband or you could shoot off your penis?

Abby

Abby: Are you serious? You're stealing my gun.
Harrison: Borrowing it.
Abby: Harrison, you do not need to act all crazy just because everyone else here is. We are the normal ones. You and me. If we need to borrow a gun, we ask. Also, why do you need it?

Mellie: I came up with a list of men. Eligible bachelors. Prominent, smart. Pick one.
Olivia: Pick one?
Mellie: Any one of them, it's an equal opportunity list. Tall, short, black, white, Republican, Democrat. I don't care who, just pick one and start dating him. Publicly. So the everyone can stop thinking that you're screwing my husband. Smile, Olivia. The world is watching.

Olivia: Why are you doing this?
Mellie: Because I like it when my husband is the President. I worked very hard for it. I've done a great deal to get us here, and you are going to get him across the finish line. But you can't do that if people know what kind of person you really are. Cheers!

[to Cyrus] Don't patronize me like I'm some hysterical teenage girl at the beginning of my cycle.

Mellie

[to Quinn] The great thing about our line of work? Rock solid job stability! As long as people have to live together, someone's gonna pay to have someone else killed! Fact of life.

Charlie

What is currently happening is that President Fitzgerald Thomas Grant III has made an enemy, the worst kind of enemy, because I know all his secrets. I know where every body is buried, and the greatest weapon I can use against him calls me 'Dad.'

Rowan Pope

[to Olivia] You're skipping around in a field full of bombs and mistaking them for daisies.

Rowan Pope

Jake: I came to say good-bye.
Olivia: Jake--
Jake: I loved you. Whatever happens next, I want to make sure you know that I loved you. I love you.

Displaying quotes 157 - 168 of 588 in total

Scandal Quotes

I am not a toy that you can play with when you're bored or lonely or horny. I am not the girl the guy gets at the end of the movie. I am not a fantasy. If you want me, earn me! Until then, we are done.

Olivia

[to Cyrus] It hurts until it doesn't. You think it's going to break you, but it won't. You may not sleep as well at night, but you will be fine. Numb, but numb and fine are the same.

Mellie