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J.D.: Here comes Kim. She has had all night to think about what she did so she will probably be in a shame spiral. Let's enjoy it!
Kim: Hey fellas! How are you living?
Turk: Large. (To J.D.) WHAT!? What? Was I not supposed to answer?
- Permalink: Here comes Kim. She has had all night to think about what she di...
J.D.: Gift Shop Girl?
Lisa: Hey J.D.
J.D.: I thought you died.
Lisa: No, I just got married.
J.D.: But I sent your family flowers.
Lisa: I know. You bought them from me. It was kind of weird.
- Permalink: Gift Shop Girl? Hey J.D. I thought you died. No, I just go...
Elliot: I am wearing red. Should I not be wearing red around her?
Turk: She's pregnant, she's not a bull.
- Permalink: I am wearing red. Should I not be wearing red around her? She'...
Dr. Kelso: Listen up, name-tags!! I need to wire some cash to my son so we can make bail. Apparently, that musical he was producing was just a front for a crystal meth lab. And heres the kicker: he fled to Toronto so now the freakin' Mounties are involved!!
- Permalink: He fled to Toronto so now the freakin' Mounties are involved!!
Carla: Remember when I first started dating Turk and I wanted to bail on him because he cried at the end of sex?
J.D.: Relax Brown Bear. There's no shame in 'crymaxing'.
- Permalink: Remember when I first started dating Turk and I wanted to bail o...
Dr. Kelso: You know the difference between you and me, Dorian?
J.D.: Your melon-sized prostate, sir?
- Permalink: You know the difference between you and me, Dorian? Your melon...
And then the ultimate Cox-block.J.D.
- Permalink: And then the ultimate Cox-block.
J.D.: I finally figured out what bothered me so much about you.
Kim: Well, lay it on me, studly.
J.D.: It's the way you're so concerned about protecting yourself. I mean, no one in this entire hospital has a bad thing to say about you, and I'm guessing that's because you're so careful not to rub anyone the wrong way. You still wear your wedding ring, that prevents any guy from getting anywhere near ya. You wouldn't operate on Mr. Peters, and we both know how you're protecting yourself there. I dunno, I guess in the grand scheme of things it's not that big a deal. I just, I was a little disappointed to find out who you turned out to be.
J.D.'s thoughts: I guess people can always surprise you.
- Permalink: I finally figured out what bothered me so much about you. Well...
Listen Reid, normally any damage to Dr. Cox's oversize ego would be cause for celebration. And yet, for some reason I'm not wearing a party hat sitting bare-ass on the hospital's copier machine. You know why? It's not because I have "Johnny" tattooed on my butt. He was an old navy buddy and if you went through what we did you'd understand... It's because your little theory is way off.Dr. Kelso
- Permalink: Listen Reid, normally any damage to Dr. Cox's oversize ego would...
Barbie, are you a real doctor, or a doctor like Dr Pepper is a doctor?Dr. Cox
- Permalink: Barbie, are you a real doctor, or a doctor like Dr Pepper is a d...
Patient: How was Acapulco?
Elliot: We told everyone that you were in Acapulco.
Dr. Cox: I never went to Acapulco. I lost three patients and spent the last two weeks on my couch trying to drink myself to death so that my victims and I could be reunited in the afterlife and they could rightly have their vengeance but then I realized that tactic would never work as I would be sent straight to hell, which I imagine is a lot like Acapulco only there would be fewer Latin men trying to sell me Chiclets on the beach. All the best.
- Permalink: How was Acapulco? We told everyone that you were in Acapulco. ...
J.D.: (Looking at his destroyed bicycle) What the hell?!
Janitor: (Holding a softball bat) Its a riddle. Two guys destroyed your bike with a softball bat and a crowbar. One of them wasnt me.
J.D.: Oh! Thats what happened to my old bike!
- Permalink: What the hell?! Its a riddle. Two guys destroyed your bike wi...