Scrubs Season 4 Quotes
Dr. Kelso: Welcome aboard! This will be your office for the next few days! Ted, find someplace else to work.
Ted: Aw, man! Not again!
- Permalink: Welcome aboard! This will be your office for the next few days! ...
Elliot: Ohhh, my God, you're right.
Carla: Don't let him be your puppet-master.
Jake: What's up?
Elliot: I have a headache.
Jake: Take some aspirin.
Elliot: Don't tell me what to do! You're not the boss of me!
- Permalink: Ohhh, my God, you're right. Don't let him be your puppet-maste...
J.D.: Oh! Can we cut words out of magazines that represent how we feel about each other and glue them into a "Friends Forever" collage?
Turk: Hell no.
J.D.: Oh. Well, can we drink beers and reminisce?
Turk: Hell yes!
J.D.: That's all I wanted to do anyway.
J.D.'s Narration: Plus, I already made the collage.
- Permalink: Oh! Can we cut words out of magazines that represent how we feel...
J.D.'s Narration: Elliot's boyfriend, Jake, had given her confidence to do things she'd never been able to do before.
Jake: Okay, you ready to do this?
Elliot: You know it!
J.D.'s Narration: ...Like talking to people when she's on the toilet.
Jake: Uh, okay, uh, I know how comfortable you are with Carla, so I'm gonna have her do the talking, all right? You just say when.
Elliot: There's cheeks on the seat, and I'm feeling good! Let's hear it.
Carla: Hello, Elliot. How are you doing?
Jake: She went out the window.
- Permalink: Elliot's boyfriend, Jake, had given her confidence to do things ...
Dr. Cox: Whoa! Bob Kelso here before noon? They're either giving away free doughnuts at the caf, or there's an Asian prostitute convention in the I.C.U.!
Dr. Kelso: Is now the time I'm supposed to be embarrassed because I like fine food and Korean call girls? Write this down, Perry: I'm old and I honestly don't care what people think about anything I do.
- Permalink: Whoa! Bob Kelso here before noon? They're either giving away fre...
Bob, people have a private life and people have a professional life, and usually those two hells are kept pretty separate. For instance, I don't know that much about your home life, other than the fact that you treat your wife like a dog, your dog like a wife, and your son like an androgynous ne'er-do-well who drained your retirement nest-egg to open up a yarn shop in Minneapolis.Dr. Cox
- Permalink: Bob, people have a private life and people have a professional l...
Dr. Kelso: No, I'm here because the budget's a mess. Ted's not making much headway.
Ted: Three-twelve times four-eighty-one equals... Sir, it's not giving me the answer!
Dr. Kelso: It's a typewriter, you jackass!
- Permalink: No, I'm here because the budget's a mess. Ted's not making much ...
Dr. Cox: All right, then, before we jump in to rounds, I see it's time for my annual cologne intervention. Lonnie, you're killing us. And, honestly, what's the point? D'you understand that no matter how badly you wanna get freaky with Karen, here, that's just not going to happen, and here's why: She thinks you have the body of a fetus. Oh, Karen, did you tell me that in confidence?
Karen: No, he knows.
Lonnie: She drew me a picture.
- Permalink: She thinks you have the body of a fetus. Oh, Karen, did you tell...
J.D.'s Narration: Turk didn't even realize he'd pissed me off, so explaining my feelings to him was the smart move. I took a slightly different tack.
J.D.: That seat's taken, ass-face!
Turk: By who?
J.D.: Hello there, Chocolate Bear Two.
Turk: Hooch!? J.D., what the hell is going on here!?
J.D.: I replaced your ass!
- Permalink: Turk didn't even realize he'd pissed me off, so explaining my fe...