Scrubs Season 4 Quotes
Elliot: I don't know how much longer I can avoid sleeping with Jake, man.
J.D.: It's easy. If you ever find yourself in a romantic situation, just do something that's a complete turn-off.
Carla: You know, like how you can swallow your whole fist.
- Permalink: I don't know how much longer I can avoid sleeping with Jake, man...
Janitor: And it's no good to hide it from me, 'cause I got keys to everything. Except the third floor mental ward. Someone stole that one.
Dr. Kelso: Was he smoking a gavel?
Janitor: Seemed to be.
- Permalink: And it's no good to hide it from me, 'cause I got keys to everyt...
(to Doug, after he takes his scooter away) No offense son, but I can't have a delusional bozo like you driving that around the halls.Dr. Kelso
- Permalink: No offense son, but I can't have a delusional bozo like you driv...
As I gangsta leaned down the hallway in the rad new wheels I found near the dumpster, I couldn't help but realize how ego affects everything.J.D.
(J.D. crashes the scooter into a cart of medical supplies)
- Permalink: As I gangsta leaned down the hallway in the rad new wheels I fou...
Turk: I'm not like that, am I?
Carla: Actually, Turk, you are slightly Coxish. Yeah! I mean, the way you do that stupid victory dance every time you win the slightest argument?
Turk: No I don't!
Carla: Maybe not. Heh. You know, Turk, you were right! Next year is not a leap year!
Suddenly Turk's on top of the desk, doing his stupid victory dance, complete with SynDrum sound effect.
- Permalink: I'm not like that, am I? Actually, Turk, you are slightly Coxi...
Jake: Elliot, but I'm an adult. I want this to be an adult relationship. If you wanna be patient and not have sex right away, then that's fine. 'Cause I think we have a chance for something great, too.
Elliot: I want you so bad right now.
J.D.: Guess I should get goin'...
- Permalink: Elliot, but I'm an adult. I want this to be an adult relationshi...
Todd: You did great work.
Turk: Hey, you know, it's not about me.
Dr. Cox comes up and puppets Turk's hand in the five.
Todd: Assisted five! I'll take it!
- Permalink: You did great work. Hey, you know, it's not about me. Dr. Cox...
Wouldn't have mattered, Jordan. You know why? Because I am always right. It's something my... my old pal, Gandhi here, knows a little something about, because, you see, we are both egotistical peas in a giant narcissistic pod. And, to prove my point, I'm gonna go ahead and make a... unnecessarily showy but undeniably impressive exit. Rope time, Gandhi.Dr. Cox
- Permalink: Wouldn't have mattered, Jordan. You know why? Because I am alway...
Elliot: I'm giving up on men!
Carla: Just call him!
Elliot: You can't make me!
J.D.: Well, unfortunately for you, I happen to know that the guy you're dating is always under speed dial number one.
Phone: Constipation hotline?
J.D.: Two is your current boyfriend!
- Permalink: I'm giving up on men! Just call him! You can't make me! We...
Elliot: Thanks for giving me a ride to work. I hope you didn't mind J.D. tagging along.
Jake: Mm-mm. Maybe next time we'll let you sit up front.
J.D.: Well, maybe next time she'll yell "shotgun" a little faster!
- Permalink: Thanks for giving me a ride to work. I hope you didn't mind J.D....
Mr. Hoffner: So, uh, are you a good surgeon?
Turk: I'm capable.
Mr. Hoffner: "Capable." I'm not sure I want-I want the surgery.
- Permalink: So, uh, are you a good surgeon? I'm capable. Capable. I'm no...
Jake: Wow, this Body Heat's a sexy movie, huh?
J.D.: Mmm. Doesn't Kathleen Turner have dynamite nerps?
- Permalink: Wow, this Body Heat's a sexy movie, huh? Mmm. Doesn't Kathleen...