Seinfeld Season 4 Episode 13: "The Pick" Quotes
George: Is this Elaine? (picks up the card)
Dana: Yeah.
George: Huh! (makes an unusual look to the card)
I don't know but I think I see your
Elaine
(scene ends)
So we go to her apartment and she goes to the bathroom. I'm cursing myself, "now how do I get out of here?" Then it hit me like a bolt of lightning. The pick!
George
Are we not human?! If we pick, do we not bleed?!
Jerry
Co-worker: (Pokes his head into the doorway) Hey, Nip, you need that manuscript or can I take it home?
Elaine: Yeah, take it! Take it! And stop calling me "Nip"!
Jerry: But I was clearly on the outer edge of the nostril.
Tia: I know what I saw. (Turns toward the elevators)
Jerry: But there, but there was no pick! I, I did not pick! There was no pick!
Tia: I gotta go. (she quickly walks away from Jerry)
Jerry: No! No pick!
George: Two weeks ago I tried a soft boiled egg. Never liked it before. Now I'm dunking a piece of toast in there and I'm loving it.
Susan: I'm not a soft boiled egg.
George: And I am not a piece of toast.
George: Hey! How come I didn't get a Christmas card? Everybody else got one. Jerry got one, Kramer got one. I thought we were good friends. I don't get a Christmas card. I don't get it.
Elaine: You want a Christmas card? You want a Christmas card? All right here. (rubs George's head on her breasts) Here's your Christmas card.
Jerry: Let me ask you something. If you were going out with somebody and if she did that what would, would you do? Would you continue going out with her?
George: No. That's disgusting!
Is that so unforgivable? Is that like breaking a commandment? Did God say to Moses thou shalt not pick?
Jerry
Jerry: What? So what? It's a nipple. A little brown circular protuberance. What's the big deal? See everybody's got them. See I got them. (lifts up shirt)
Kramer: I got them too. (lifts up shirt also)
Jerry: See? Everybody's got them.
George: Was it a scratch or a pick?
Jerry: It was a pick!
George: Hey, it's me you're talking to! Was there any nostril penetration?
Jerry: (stutters) There may have been some accidental penetration!
