I can't commit to a woman. I'm not committing to an airline.

Jerry

A plane crash? A heart attack? Lupus?! Is it lupus?!

George

Kramer: What kind of a man are you? The guy is unconscious in a coma and you don't have the guts to kiss his girlfriend?
Jerry: I didn't know what the coma etiquette was.

You know I don't get that whole suicide machine. There's no tall buildings where these people live? They can't wrap their lips around a revolver like a normal person?

Jerry

Gina: A man is lying here unconscious and you're afraid of him? What kind of a man are you?
Jerry: A man who respects a good coma.

George: Hey, I'm all set. I got the ticket. I'm going to the Cayman Islands this Friday.
Jerry: I don't get you. Who goes on vacation without a job? What, do you need a break from getting up at 11:00?

Elaine: Hey, have you ever fasted?
Jerry: Well, once I didn't have dinner until, like nine o'clock. That was pretty rough.

It's not like a Sonny Von Bulow coma.

Jerry

Jerry: Let me ask you something. How long do you have to wait for a guy to come out of a coma, before you can ask his ex-girlfriend out?Kramer: Gina? Why wait? Why not just call Dr. Kevorkian?

Elaine: I wonder what Gandhi ate before he fasted.Jerry: I heard he used to polish off a box of Triscuits.Elaine: Really?Jerry: Oh yeah, Gandhi loved Triscuits.

Is that Drake's Coffee Cake?

Newman

Hello Newman.

Jerry
Displaying quotes 13 - 24 of 24 in total

Seinfeld Season 3 Episode 15 Quotes

Jerry: Let me ask you a question. If you named a kid Rasputin do you think that would have a negative effect on his life?
Elaine: Nah.

The carpet sweeper is the biggest scam perpetrated on the American public since one-hour martinizing.

Kramer
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