Seinfeld Season 1 Quotes
If you've got a t-shirt with blood stains all over it maybe laundry isn't your biggest problem right now.
Jerry
George: What, it was purple, I liked it. I don't actually recall considering the button!
Jerry: Oh you don't recall?
George: Uh no, not at this time.
Jerry: Well senator I'd just like to know what you knew and when you knew it.
Trust me George, no one has any interest in seeing you on caffeine.
Clair
George: Listen, your stuff has to be done by know, why don't you just see if it's dried?
Jerry: No, no, no, don't interrupt the cycle. The machine is working, it, it knows what it's doing, just let it finish.
George: You're gonna over dry it.
Jerry: You, you can't over dry.
George: Why not?
Jerry: Same as you can't over wet. You see, once something is wet, it's wet. Same thing with dead: like once you die you're dead, right? Let's say you drop dead and I shoot you: you're not gonna die again, you're already dead. You can't over die, you can't over dry.
George: Ho ho ho, "Had to"? "Had to come in"?
Jerry: Yeah, but
George: "Had to come in" and "maybe we'll get together"? "Had to" and "Maybe"?
Jerry: Yeah!
George: Nonono, I hate to tell you this: you're not gonna see this woman.
Let's face it, a date is a job interview that lasts all night. The difference between a date and job interview is not many interviews is there a chance you'll end up naked at the end.
Jerry