Jerry: Maybe he (the chauffer) knows O'Brien.
George: No, he doesn't know O'Brien, if he knew O'Brien, he wouldn't have a sign.

I know Jerry. He's not a Nazi. No. He's just neat.

Elaine

There's always been something very strange about Jerry. Always so clean and organized.

Kramer

I am not O'Brien! I am not O'Brien! I repeat, I am not O'Brien! Ask anyone! Jerry! JERRY!

.</i> George

Kramer: (points to Jerry) O'Brien, long time no see. (points to George) How's tricks, Murphy?
Tim: Why did you call him O'Brien and him Murphy?
Jerry: No, he was talking to me. He's cross-eyed.
Elaine: It could be very confusing.

Nice lookin' Luger.

Jerry

Vandelay Industries. Kal Varnsen speaking. How may I help you?

Jerry

Jerry (on Keith Hernandez): Yeah, he's a real smart guy too. He's a Civil War buff.
George: I'd love to be a Civil War buff. What do you have to do to be a buff?
Jerry: So Biff wants to be a buff? Well, sleeping less than 18 hours a day would be a start.

George: I am not a chucker! I Never have chucked! Never will chuck! No chuck! Kramer, am I a chucker?
Kramer: Oh, you're a chucker, buddy.

Jerry, he's a guy.

Elaine

I'm not drivin' him to the airport!

Jerry

The sad thing is, we'd never know the truth.

Jerry

Seinfeld Season 3 Quotes

George: A man gave me a massage.
Jerry: So?
George: So he had his hands and, uh, he was
Jerry: He was what?
George: He was touching and rubbing.

Raymond: (massaging George's hamstring) How did you do this?
George: (VERY tense) Do what?
Raymond: How did you hurt your hamstring?
George: (quickly) I dunno
Raymond: You don't know?
George: I dunno
Raymond: Okay, where did this happen?
George: (Quickly again) Korea.
Raymond: Korea?
George: Korea.
Raymond: You hurt yourself in Korea?
George: I dunno.