We’re all addicts Fiona, trying to fill a void. Some of us are just better at hiding it, right?

Robbie

Holy shit, you popped his cherry? And how was the 30 seconds of bliss.

Veronica

Do you know why doctors, lawyers and nurses are great liars? Because they lie to help people.

Steve

Well if you need me, I'll be in the bushes across the street stalking you.

Steve

I also danced with Cab Calloway, he had the first colored penis I ever kissed.

Fake Aunt Ginger

She was born with a large clitoris!

Frank

I saw how you looked at Steve like a d-o-g in heat.

Veronica

That's your teenage diseased mind talking. You tasted penii and now you're just crazy!

Sheila's husband

Frank: Beautiful day for a party!
Neighbors: It's for kids, Frank. No booze!

Oh don't mind me, I accidentally took three of my pills instead of one.

Sheila

Lip: What exactly does hooked up mean?
Kevin: Last I checked penis goes into the vagina.

Fiona: Debbie stole a baby; we have to figure out how to return it.
Lip: Why?
Fiona: It's Debbie.

Shameless Quotes

Lip: What exactly does hooked up mean?
Kevin: Last I checked penis goes into the vagina.

Surround sound bitching is the only thanks I get.

Frank