Oh, so you get to leave late 'cause you're fucking the boss?

Ian

It totally looks like you just fucked a tadpole.

Carl

Carl: Knives are in the drawer if you want to do a home abortion.
Fiona: Carl!

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I'm not killing my baby. It's not a baby. It's a few cells.

Debbie

They pay for dollars for espresso. They can suck my balls if they want.

Svetlana

He's coming back. His parents are ass holes.

Debbie

I'm sick of hearing about your dead girlfriend.

Fiona

Fiona: Does he talk?
Carl: I got him covered.

Frank: What is the matter with you people? She was my soul mate.
Debbie: She probably killed herself just to get away from you.

Get up old man.

Fiona

I don't know how much more of that I can take without stabbing him in the neck with a broken beer bottle.

Fiona

Guess our reputation as a shit hole is still safe.

Waitress

Shameless Quotes

Lip: What exactly does hooked up mean?
Kevin: Last I checked penis goes into the vagina.

Surround sound bitching is the only thanks I get.

Frank