Frank: Who the hell is Gary?
Sammi: He's one of your new Native American kids. I think he's the one with the Justin Bieber haircut.

Jesus guys, it's 90 days in country club jail. It's not Guantanamo. She's probably learning a useful trade and brushing up on her Spanish.

Lip

Nobody's gonna roll me. I carry pepper spray and a shiv.

Debbie

Mickey have a seat man. Nobody give a shit who you bang.

Kev

I feel a little bit like "Pretty Woman."

Lip

What's the point of getting a new liver if the damn thing won't do what it's designed to do?

Frank

Mental illness Russian Roulette with Monica's DNA as the bullet.

Fiona

We're taking care of him here. You, me, us. He's f**king family.

Mickey [to Fiona]

I promise, I'm gonna be a better dad.

Kev: Look I'm just trying to put everything in the past okay? I'm a conscientious objector now.
Mickey: What the f*ck does that mean?
Kev: I don't really know. Something to do with Muhammed Ali. Peace and love.

Wanna torture your parents? Bring them to my house for dinner tonight. Here's the address. We're having leftover lasagna I stole from the cafeteria. Don't ever say I'm not a man of my word again.

Lip

I don't have an interest in being a mistress anymore.

Ian

Shameless Quotes

Sean: You took your monitor off yourself.
Fiona: So?
Sean: So, you should have waited for the P.O. and you know it.
Fiona: That's a technicality. You're gonna judge me for that?
Sean: No, I'm not gonna judge you for that. I find it charming as fuck that you took a screwdriver to your monitor. And I find it sexy as hell that you had a bloody lip before lunch today.
Fiona: Are you making fun of me?
Sean: No. It's just you're a chaos junkie, Fiona. And I'm a junkie, junkie. So I love chaos. And when I get into chaos, bad shit follows.

Lip: You are gorgeous, okay? You are sweet. You are funny. You're very smart. You know that, right?
Mandy: Shut up.
Lip: Hey, hey, I mean it, okay? You're a good person Mandy.