What's insane is a ten percent levy on baked goods. You do realize the Revolutionary war began on less than two percent. How is the public not flocking to the streets in outrage? We must do something.

Ichabod

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Jenny: What's your name? Tall, dark and British?
Ichabod: My name is Ichabod Crane.
Jenny: Huh. What do your friends call you? Ichy?
Ichabod: Not if they wish to remain my friends.

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Oh. You embroidered my name on some oversized hosiery. How... odd.

Ichabod

• Permalink: Oh. You embroidered my name on some oversized hosiery. How... odd.
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Ichabod: It is I who should thank you, kind woman, for unlocking this vehicle from afar, and showing me how the entertainment system operates. Farewell, Yolanda.
Yolanda: Thank you for calling Northstar Assistance.

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Abbie: Seven years of tribulation.
Ichabod: According to scripture.
Abbie: How long have we been doin' this so far?
Ichabod: Mmmm. I'm certain it will become easier once we become accustomed to... No. I'm too tired to lie.

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Ichabod: You've been emancipated, I take it.
Abbie: Excuse me?
Ichabod: From enslavement.

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Ichabod: Abbie, there's always another way.
Abbie: That's the first time you've ever called me Abbie.

• Permalink: That's the first time you've ever called me Abbie.
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His honor Edmund Burke once said "The only thing necessary for the triumph of evil is for good men to do nothing." And we may all at time, stand idly when action is required.

Ichabod

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Ichabod: I'm afraid your so-called 'smart' phone couldn't tell you that.
Abbie: Look at you, coppin' some 'tude.

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You stopped having pow wows? I rather enjoyed those.

Ichabod

• Permalink: You stopped having pow wows? I rather enjoyed those.
• Rating: 5.0 / 5.0

Abbie: All of our personal issues aside, she's not gonna help us because I'm a cop and she's a criminal.
Ichabod: Oh, she's a criminal now?
Abbie: Do you know why she's locked up in here? She broke into a sporting goods store and stole a bunch of survival gear. Over four thousand bucks worth of stuff.
Ichabod: And does your current law enforcement incarcerate all thieves in sanatoriums?
Abbie: She told the cops that she needed it because she was preparing for the end of days.
Ichabod: Well. She's perfectly sane then.

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Police Detective: Do you admit to cutting off his head, yes or no?
Ichabod: Nooo. First I shot him, then he rose back up. Cutting off his head seemed the next logical step.

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