South Park Season 2 Episode 13: "Cow Days" Quotes
Jimbo: What's all the ruckus over there?
Mayor: Sounds like somebody declared shenanigans.
Jimbo: Oh, hell, I have to run home and grab my broom!
Wow, and this Vietnamese prostitute can really ride a bull! I guess she's had a lot of practice, if you know what I mean.Announcer
Stan: Dude I'm having second thoughts about this.
Kyle: What do you mean?
Stan: I'm starting to think that maybe it's wrong to put someone who thinks they're a Vietnamese prostitute onto a bull.
(After two contestants win on a game show)
Announcer: Tom and Mary, put on your cowboy hats because you're going to beautiful, South Park, Colorado!
Announcer: That's right, just in time for "Cow Days" the worlds 45th biggest Rodeo and Carnival. Every year South Park celebrates Cow Days, and you're going to be a part of it! You'll stay at the Super 7 Hotel, Ride the rides, play the games and the world famous "Running of the Cows"! Congrats!
Doctor: Boys, I'm afraid your fat little friend has suffered a head trauma.
Stan: What's the matter with him?
Doctor: Well, apparently he thinks he's a Vietnamese prostitute named Ming-Li.
Stan: (about the T&P Dolls) Oh, dude. We've GOT to get one of those!
Cartman: How much to play?
Carnie: Only five dollars for three balls, kid.
Cartman: Five dollars?! Jesus Christ!
Carnie: Don't worry, kid, it's easy; you just gotta put one ball through Jennifer Love Hewitt's mouth.
Cartman: That's easy!
Officer Barbrady: Young man, you can't just go around declaring shenanigans on innocent people; that's how wars get started!
Stan: Sorry, Officer Buttbaby
Officer Barbrady: Barbrady!
Stan: Oh, I'm sorry. What did I say?
Officer Barbrady: You said "Buttbaby"!
(The boys laugh.)
Cartman: What the hell makes you think Cartman rides a bull?
Kyle: Because you spent all our money on those stupid rides, fat ass! Either you're getting on a bull, or I'm gonna break your f(beep)king head open!
Cartman: Okay, I'll get on the bull.
Well Cartman, this is just my opinion, but I think the line ride sucked donkey balls!Kyle
Jimbo: Hey, where's she going? That's the wrong way, you stupid cow.
(cows line up on a cliff)
FBI Executive: Oh, dear Jesus, no!
(the cows jump off one by one)
Jimbo: No! They're killing themselves! Stop please! Can't we do anything? Oh God, the humanity, Ned, the humanity!
FBI Executive: This is the first mad cow suicide I've seen in at least eight months.
Kyle: How much money do we have left Cartman?
Cartman: Ahh three dollars.
Kyle: What? You said we had plenty of money, Cartman!
Cartman: Yeah but I didn't take into account the fact that I suck at math.
Kyle: YOU SON OF A BITCH! (attacks Cartman)