South Park

Wednesdays 10:00 PM on Comedy Central
South park
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Hindsight: what is your power?
Kenny (as Mysterion): I can't die. I've experienced death countless times. Sometimes, I see a bright light. Sometimes, I see Heaven or Hell. But eventually, no matter what, I wake up in my bed wearing my same old clothes. The wort part? No one even remembers me dying. I go to school the next day and everyone is just like "Oh, Hey Kenny," even if they had seen me get decapitated with their own eyes. You want to whine about Curses, Hindsight? You're talking to the wrong f**king cowboy.

Unfortunately, we've just been imformed the Dark Lord Cthulu has shat on the runway of the New Orleans airport and we'll be delayed at least another hour.

Flight Attendant

Tell Brett Favre he shouldn't have sent actual pictures of his schlong.

Captain Hindsight

You can't kick me out of Coon & Friends, I'm the f**cking Coon!

Cartman

Our environment should stabilize if it's getting drilled here, here, and here.

Tony Hayward

We no longer f**k the earth, we DP it.

Tony Hayward

All Coon friends report to base. I'm so seriously.

Cartman

And it will be like a taco inside taco within a Taco Bell that's inside a KFC that's within a mall that's inside your dream!

Doctor

Dr. Chinstrap: If they don't, it'll be the end of Europe as we know it.
Sharon: Why?
Dr. Chinstrap: Because.

Inception Guy #1: Is this the dream, or the dream within the dream?
Inception Guy #2: It doesn't matter! Just keep shooting!

Dr. Chinstrap: We need you, Freddy.
Freddy Kruger: Yeah, like you needed me to kill those teenagers to stop the Russians?

When a chick says we need to talk, you might as well start punching yourself in the balls, dude.

Cartman
Displaying quotes 13 - 24 of 87 in total

South Park Season 14 Quotes

Does a bear crap in the woods and does the Pope crap on the dreams of 200 deaf boys?

Cartman

Kyle: Wow, I didn't know Golf games were this cool.
Cartman: Yeah dude, EA Sports outdid themselves this time.