South Park Season 3 Quotes
Stan: Oh, my god! Fonics monkey killed Kenny!
Cartman: You're damn right, he did.
- Permalink: Oh, my god! Fonics monkey killed Kenny! You're damn right, he ...
Mayor McDaniels: Alright, Eric. Here's your word. Chair.
Cartman: C'mon Phonics monkey, drum!
(Monkey does nothing)
(Monkey is doing something, but not drumming)
Cartman: Eric, your word is chair!
Mayor McDaniels: Something you sit on.
Cartman: Country of origin?
Mayor McDaniels: English!
Cartman: Could you use it in a sentence?
Mayor McDaniels: FOR GOD SAKES, KID, THE WORD IS CHAIR!
Cartman: ChairC-H-A-R-E (Buzzer) Dammit, how come I always get the hard ones? (Runs off the stage) GET OVER HERE, YOU SON OF A BITCH PHONICS MONKEY!
- Permalink: Alright, Eric. Here's your word. Chair. C'mon Phonics monkey, ...
(Mark, the home schooled kid, rolls into Mr. Garrison's class in a giant hamster ball.)
Mark: Hey guys, what's up?
Cartman: Dude, what's wrong with you, you got some kind of John Travolta disease or something?
Mr. Garrison: Alright children, let's all just try to ignore the fact that there's a little boy in a giant hamster ball and continue on with our lesson, okay?
- Permalink: Hey guys, what's up? Dude, what's wrong with you, you got some...
(at the spelling bee) Kyle, Kyle, he's our man, if he can't do it I'm out 50 bucks.Jimbo
- Permalink: Kyle, Kyle, he's our man, if he can't do it I'm out 50 bucks.
Mark: Now look at her she's a damn whore papa.
Butters: Damn right.
- Permalink: Now look at her she's a damn whore papa. Damn right.
Cartman: Alright that's it, SCREW YOU GUYS; I'm going to home school.
Mr. Garrison: Oh please God, let it be forever.
- Permalink: Alright that's it, SCREW YOU GUYS; I'm going to home school. O...
Jimbo: You can do it kid, you can do it!
(after Kyle spells incorrectly)
Jimbo: YOU LITTLE BASTARD!!, YOU COSTED ME 50 BUCKS!!!!
- Permalink: You can do it kid, you can do it! YOU LITTLE BASTARD!!, YOU ...
Stan: Shut up, Cartman!
Cartman: You shut up, butt-hole! (Hit's Stan)
Stan: You shut up, gay-wad! (Hit's Cartman)
Cartman: You shut up, ass-logger! (Hit's Stan)
Mark: Oh my goodness. Are you two enemies?
Stan: No... we're friends.
Mark: Strange friends would call each other names and fight.
- Permalink: Shut up, Cartman! You shut up, butt-hole! You shut up, gay-...
(singing) Who would have thought such a miracle could be, who could have known that this moment I would see, a new way of living, a chance to be free!</i> Cartman
- Permalink: Who would have thought such a miracle could be, who could have k...
Cartman: You're going down bitch!
Kyle: Shut up fat-ass, everyone knows I can spell better than you.
Cartman: Yeah, well this year I have a secret weapon. (Gives Phonics Monkey a thumbs up)
- Permalink: You're going down bitch! Shut up fat-ass, everyone knows I can...
Now look at her, she's a goddamned whore, Papa.Mark
- Permalink: Now look at her, she's a goddamned whore, Papa.
Gerald: You see, son, fads come and go. And this "Chin-po-ko Mon" is obviously nothing more than a fad. You don't have to be a part of it. In fact, you can make an even stronger statement by saying to your peers, "I'm not going to be a part of this fad, because I'm an individual." Do you understand?
Kyle: Yes. Yes, I do, Dad. Now let me tell you how it works in the real world. In the real world, I can either get a Chinpokomon, or I can be the only kid without one, which singles me out, and causes the other kids to make fun of me and kick my ass.
Gerald: Hmm. Good point; here's $10. On second thought, here's $20 pick up one for your brother too.
- Permalink: You see, son, fads come and go. And this Chin-po-ko Mon is obvio...
Chinpokomon Executive: You are American.
South Park Toy Store Owner: Yes.
Chinpokomon Executive: Ohhh, you must have very big penis!
South Park Toy Store Owner: Excuse me, I was just asking you what your up to with these toys.
Chinpokomon Executive: Nothing, we are very simple people with very small penis. Mr. Hosik's penis is especially small!
Mr. Hosik: So small.
Chinpokomon Executive: We cannot achieve so much with such small penis, but you American wow, penis so big, so big penis!
South Park Toy Store Owner: Well aah I guess it is pretty good size.
- Permalink: You are American. Yes. Ohhh, you must have very big penis! ...
Stan: All we ever heard growing up was "save the rainforest. The rainforest is fragile."
Kyle: Yeah. Fragile, my ass!
- Permalink: All we ever heard growing up was save the rainforest. The rainfo...