Don't you see guys Christmas is about presents.

</i> Stan

(as Barbie) Butters, would you like to slap my titties around?

Butters

I'm just a stupid piece of crap.

Mr. Hanky

But Dad, we're just pieces of crap, Christmas isn't for us.

Cornwallis

(enthusiastically) An animated Christmas card! Kids, that just might be the dumbest idea I've ever heard, ever!

Mayor

(while making the Christmas Card)
Kyle: Ok. 'woo' mouths again...
Stan: (clicks camera) one. two.
Kyle: So how much done is that?
Stan: "We wish you a m-merry..."
Kyle: Jesus Christ.

Cornwallis: We fixed it!
Mrs. Hankey: What's that kids?! They got your father's penis working again!

Mr. Hankey: Come. You have to meet the little nuggets, too. Kids! This is our son, Cornwallis.
Cornwallis: Howdy Ho!
Mr. Hankey: Our daughter Amber.
Amber: Howdy Ho!
b>Mr. Hankey: And our son, Simon.
Simon: Eee, hey! Hnhn.
Mr. Hankey: Simon's not so smart. He was born with a peanut in his head.

Mrs. Hankey: (to Mayor's aide) You wanna bet me I won't take off my clothes and run naked through this parking lot?
Mr. Hankey: Honey, please don't start.
Mrs. Hankey: I didn't start it! He was lookin' at my breasts!
Mr. Hankey: They're not real, ya know!
Mrs. Hankey: Don't you say that!
Mr. Hankey: Oh, big secret, everyone can tell they're made of silicorn!

Mr. Hankey: Kids, Christmas is back on! We gotta all go get that old drive-in working again!
Hankey Kids: Okay!
Mrs. Hankey: That's not the only thing we gotta get working again, if you know what I mean. [Points at Mr. Hankey's "crotch"]
Mr. Hankey: Why, why, why do you have to say things like that in front of people?

Why does everyone in cartoons have such big heads?

Stan

Kyle: He's gonna be here any minute, Ike.
Ike: Oooh nooo, poopies.
Kyle: He might not come if you're too close to the toilet bowl, Ike.

South Park Season 4 Quotes

Kyle: But you know, I've learned something today. You see, the basis of all reasoning is the mind's awareness of itself. What we think, the external objects we perceive, are all like actors that come on and off stage. But our consciousness, the stage itself, is always present to us.
Cartman: Tits.

Cartman: You guys, you guys! Oh my god, seriously, you guys!
Stan: What the hell's wrong with Cartman?
Kyle: He's fat and stupid.