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The-big-bang-theory

Sheldon: She stiffed you?
Penny: I believe that's what he did to her.

I'm so proud of you! You sold yourself out like a common streetwalker!

Sheldon

Good morning, slut.

Penny

Given how much time you spend engaging in pointless self-abuse, you might consider just this once using your genitalia to actually accomplish something.

Sheldon

It is to viagra as viagra is to a green M&M.

Sheldon

Penny, you're an expert on trading sexual favors for material gain, walk him through this.

Sheldon

You seem to have forgotten the reason we live together is that we're best friends. And I've got your back, Jack.

Sheldon

An entire dinner to talk about your research? Where you goin, the drive thru at Jack In The Box

Sheldon

Amy: This year's donations may go to, say, the geology department.
Sheldon: Oh dear, not the dirt people.

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