Think of Sheldon when you apply it.

Penny (hands Howard the coupon)

Penny: "50 cents off Vagisil"
Sheldon: Think of me when you apply it.

Sheldon: Careful, Amy. The friend of my enemy's girlfriend is my enemy.
Amy: Really?
Sheldon: Yes. You're either with me or against me.
Amy: Do you want to take the bus to work?
Sheldon: Maybe there's a third option.

Penny: He's still mad at Leonard, huh?
Amy: Well, he's mad at you, too. He said you were the succubus that led his friend astray.
Penny: I don't know what succubus is, but it has "suck" in it, so that can't be good.

Howard: No, I am definitely up a cup size.
Raj: You, know, b-but they're very firm, so you've got that going for you.
Howard: You think?
Raj: Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Very perky.
Howard: Thank you. I really needed to hear that today.

Hey, easy. My nipples are sensitive.

Howard

Jump up and down -- let's see if they jigggle

Raj

I need you to be honest with me. Do my boobs look bigger to you?

Howard

Sheldon: Now I think I hear kissing.
Amy: Like you know what kissing sounds like.
Sheldon: There's kissing in Star Trek, smarty-pants.

Sheldon: Amy, there were Chinese food containers ... in the trash can.
Amy: Poor Leonard.

Howard: I feel so stupid. And fat.
Bernadette: That's okay. You still look great to me. In fact, why don't we go in the bedroom and I'll prove it to you?
Howard: Sex? Really? That's just your solution for everything.

Howard: You're full of estrogen and you don't act like that.
Bernadette: That's 'cause I'm a woman. I've had years of practice riding the dragon.

The Big Bang Theory Season 7 Episode 2 Quotes

Don't try to trick me into buying something I don't want. Now, let's talk Aquaman.

Sheldon

Leonard: I didn't tell Sheldon so we could have a few days alone.
Penny: Oh, that is so romantic.
Leonard: Uh, sure, that's why I did it.