The Big Bang Theory
Thursdays 8:00 PM on CBSThe Big Bang Theory Season 6 Episode 11: "The Santa Simulation" Quotes
Ho, ho, ho, you big dork!
Okay, so Wolowitz and Stuart are paralyzed, Santa's dead, and I picked this over sex with my girlfriend.
Leonard
You think that's bad. In college, I passed out at a frat party and woke up with more clothes on.
Amy
Leonard: I grew up in a house full of crazy academics. Instead of leaving Santa milk and cookies, we had to leave him a research paper. And, in the morning you could tell he'd been there because that paper would be graded.
Sheldon: No wonder you love Christmas. That sounds amazing.
Raj: I bought her a couple drinks and she gave me her email address.
Bernadette: "jennifer@notevenifyourethelastguyonearth.loser"
Wait, doesn't anyone have a-a Rod of Resurrection? If you've got one, I need it bad. Get in here with your rod and give it to me.
Raj
Stuart: What's wrong with Christmas?
Sheldon: Where to begin? Trees indoors, overuse of the words "tis" and "twas," and the absurd custom of one stocking. Everyone notice socks belong in pairs. Who uses one sock?
Howard: A pirate with a peg leg.
Sheldon: Actually, that helps. Thank you.
Howard: You see, I have to play Dungeons and Dragons ... for the marriage.
Bernadette: You're an idiot.
Howard: I'm your idiot.
Amy: By rolling dice and playing make believe with little figurines?
Sheldon: Like a bunch of savages.
Penny: Is having a real-life girlfriend that has sex with you getting in the way of your board games.
Leonard: A little bit, yeah.
Penny: You are so butch.
Leonard: Oh, I got a little paper cut.
Penny: Of course you did, your hands are softer than veal.
