The Big Bang Theory

Thursdays 8:00 PM on CBS
The big bang theory
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I hear Afghanistan is nice this time of year.

University President

No problem ... Fruit Loops.

Astronaut Mass

Wine and a girl in the dark ... he's going to be bored out of his mind.

Sheldon

You call that a glowstick? [Pulls out his light saber and turns it on.] That is a glowstick!

Leonard

Oh, how about Rocket Man?

Raj

Howard: You can't do "Buzz." Buzz is taken
Raj: Buzz Lightyear is not real.
Howard: No, that's not what I'm talking about.
Raj: Well, are you talking about when he thought he was real?
Howard: No

Sheldon, that's not what girlfriends are for. Although, you don't use them for what they're for, so what do I know?

Penny

Leonard: 'Sup
Sheldon: 'Sup

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Howard: I got pretty exciting NASA news today. Next week I fly to Houston for orientation and zero-gravity elimination drills.
Penny: What does that mean?
Bernadette: He's gonna to learn to poop in space.
Howard: Open the pod bay doors, HAL.
Raj: Maybe your nickname should be "Brown Dynamite."

To amend the words of Toy Story -- "You've not got a friend in me."

Sheldon

I am sick of the Roommate Agreement.

Leonard

Raj: They put you under for a cleaning?
Sheldon: They have to -- I'm a biter.

Displaying quotes 109 - 120 of 261 in total

The Big Bang Theory Season 5 Quotes

You can't blame yourself. When your prefrontal cortex fails to make you happy promiscuity rewards you with the needed flood of dopamine. We, neurobiologists, refer to this as the skank reflex.

Amy

I feel like two totally different people. Dr. Jekyyl and Mrs. Whore.

Penny