Abbott: He stood in my office, looked me in the eye and lied to me and I bought it.
Cho: Don't feel bad. Jane could sell cats to mice.

You've been LaRoched haven't you?

Jane

Marcus Kuzmenko, more of a gentle lover or a brute?

Jane

Lisbon: Are you leaving the CBI?
Jane: No, of course not. What would I do for amusement?

Fischer: You ever wonder what Jane thinks about it?
Cho: Never.
Fischer: Really, why not?
Cho: My brain would explode.

Don't be naive. Men lie... and kill.

Van Pelt

Lisbon: Are you sure about this?
Jane: Are you ever going to tire of asking me that?

Mrs. Elkins: How can you be so cold?
Patrick: Practice.

Lisbon: Look, we have a serious problem.
Jane: Yeah, I was really looking forward to a muffin.

Lisbon: You look a little creaky.
Jane: Yeah, a cattle prod will do it to you.
Lisbon: Well, the doctor says there's no lasting effects.
Jane: Well that doctor should try it himself sometime.

Aren't we all part of the Justice League? Do you think Aquaman would give Batman a ticket?

Jane

Lisbon: Sweetie, it's all right. We're with the CBI.
Jane: I know it sounds made up but we have a website and everything.

The Mentalist Quotes

Check you out. Good looking and helpful.

Lisbon

I just don't want you to leave.

Jane