The Office

The Office "Christening" Quotes

Michael: You know how these things go...construction projects, they say three months and then after two years the lazy bums haven't even started. Now we're those lazy bums.
 • Rating: Unrated

Ryan: Welcome to the party, everyone have their Koooool-Aiiiiid?
 • Rating: 5.0 / 5.0

Toby [to God]: Why you always gotta be so mean to me?
 • Rating: 5.0 / 5.0

Dwight (on phone): Hello, it's Dwight from the vestibule. You wanna know my 11th commandment? I will not be undersold. I am ready to love thy neighbor with these kinda discounts.
 • Rating: Unrated

Pam: We're gonna need a loaves and fishes kind of miracle to feed them all.
Angela [to Pam]: Jesus is not your caterer.
Angela [to Cece]: But he should be your caterer, because you're a little angel. Why didn't your parents get you a caterer?
 • Rating: Unrated

Ryan: For all their generosity of spirit, they password protect their wireless?
Kelly: Try Jesus.
 • Rating: 5.0 / 5.0

Dwight: As a gift to this beautiful congregation I would like to offer...a four percent discount on all Dunder Mifflin/Sabre products, if you buy a printer at full price.
 • Rating: Unrated

Ryan: I've been to that place. If you go to Cabo San Lucas, all the prostitutes are from Cabo Corrientes.
 • Rating: Unrated

Michael: I don't even know how to say this, but Cece is turning out to be a little b-*-t-c-h.
 • Rating: Unrated

Toby: Sunday church service, it's been a few years. The Big Guy and I...we've got some catching up to do.
 • Rating: Unrated

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