The Office Season 4 Episode 2: "Dunder-Mifflin Infinity" Quotes
Dwight: Are you enjoying your vegetarian noodles?
Angela: Very much. How's your meat?
Dwight: Dry. Delicious.
Angela: I heard a joke today.
Dwight: Oh, that's funny.
Angela: Yes, it was.
Dwight: Are you enjoying your mineral water?
Angela: I can't do this. I can't be with you. Every time I look in your eyes I see Sprinkles' stiff lifeless body.
- Permalink: Are you enjoying your vegetarian noodles? Very much. How's you...
Ryan: Well, today was a fantastic waste of time.
Michael: I disagree, I think it was very valuable.
Ryan: Michael, technology helps business OK? You should not resist it, this is the way the world is moving.
Michael: I happen to think the old ways of doing business are better. And I can prove it.
Ryan: Ok. I look forward to hearing your ideas.
- Permalink: Well, today was a fantastic waste of time. I disagree, I think...
I'm gonna live for a very long time. My grandma Schrute lived to be 101. My grandpa Manheim is 103, and still puttering around in Argentina. I tried to go visit him once, but my travel visa was protested by the Shoah Foundation.Dwight
- Permalink: I'm gonna live for a very long time. My grandma Schrute lived to...
Jan: Ryan. Ryan. Ryan, Ryan.
Ryan: So elephant in the room, I have your old job.
Jan: Well, not exactly my job... I had a different title.
Ryan: Oh well, excuse me, same office, same responsibilities.
Jan: Different salary. You'll get there, don't worry.
Ryan: Well... you look great.
Jan: Thank you, thank you.
Ryan: Scranton suits you.
Jan: Best decision I ever made.
Ryan: You were let go.
Jan: You know what? I love the beard. Keep it forever.
- Permalink: Jan. Ryan. Ryan. Ryan, Ryan. So elephant in the room, I have...
Kelly: I want you to tell me that you care about me. That is what I want.
Ryan: Kelly, I'm your boss now, OK? You can't keep talking to me like I'm your boyfriend.
Kelly: Oh big strong man, fancy new whatever. I don't think you ever cared about me.
Ryan: I never cared about you? Six months ago Karen Filipelli sent me an email. Asked me out. I said no, because I was committed to our relationship.
Kelly: Well, I hope you're still committed because I'm pregnant.
- Permalink: I want you to tell me that you care about me. That is what I wan...
Phyllis: Wait, uh, how do you touch just one of these buttons at a time?
Stanley: I don't know.
Phyllis: Did you even try?
Stanley: If the kid wants to set mine up, I'll let him.
Phyllis: I can't see half of the things.
Stanley: It's too little. Use the phone.
- Permalink: Wait, uh, how do you touch just one of these buttons at a time? ...
Ryan: So, how are you?
Kelly: Awesome. I am dating a lot of guys.
Kelly: A lot. Black guys mostly.
- Permalink: So, how are you? Awesome. I am dating a lot of guys. Good. ...
Ryan: OK, what's up?
Michael: Yeah, kay. I was just... After the presentation, just wanted to make sure, that vis-a-vis, that everything in the office is business as usual?
Ryan: Well it is business, but not as usual.
Michael: Yeah, I know I understand... we're making great strides and we're updating, but business as usual, no?
Ryan: No. We're throwing out the entire playbook, we're starting from scratch, we're implementing a brand new system.
Michael: Good, so, we're on the same page?
Ryan: No. We're not. Michael, I know exactly how much time and man power are wasted in this branch. This company is getting younger, faster, more efficient. You need to prepare yourself
- Permalink: OK, what's up? Yeah, kay. I was just... After the presentation...
Jim: Swore I wouldn't tell anyone this, but in the interest of revealing secrets. Oh my God, this will make your brain explode. Umm, Dwight and Angela dating. Have been for six months.
Jim: Swear to God.
- Permalink: Swore I wouldn't tell anyone this, but in the interest of reveal...
Creed: We're screwed.
Michael: Who is?
Creed: Us? You and me. The old timers.
Michael: I am not old. You are old. You are like a hundred.
Creed: You're over 40, that's the cut off. Are you listening to what he's saying? Re-training. New system. Youth. I'm telling you this kid is the grim reaper. You deal with this or you, me, Sammy, Phyllis, the chick you hit with the car, we're goners.
- Permalink: We're screwed. Who is? Us? You and me. The old timers. I a...
Ryan: This is a massive overhaul. We're getting younger. Sleeker. And more agile so that we adapt to the market place. All essential personnel will be issued Blackberries for company use.
Michael: Ohhhh. Gimmme, gimme, gimme, gimme, gimme, gimme.
Ryan: I'll stick around to help you set them up afterwards. Any questions?
Dwight: What if we don't want to use a Blackberry because they are stupid and pointless?
Ryan: This is company-wide, Dwight.
Dwight: Got it.
Andy: We should call it Dunder Mifflinfinity. You know, push the words together?
Ryan: Any other questions?
Kelly: Can we speak privately about our relationship?
Ryan: Thank you everybody.
- Permalink: This is a massive overhaul. We're getting younger. Sleeker. And ...
Wait a second. Last time I checked, Dunder Mifflin already has a website. And quite frankly, I'm not really sure what's wrong with it. [cut to Jim looking at the website reading "Under Construction. Coming Christmas 2002!"]Jim
- Permalink: Wait a second. Last time I checked, Dunder Mifflin already has a...
Jim Halpert's off the market. Guess who just became the best looking single guy in the office?Andy
- Permalink: Jim Halpert's off the market. Guess who just became the best loo...
It's not a surprise to me. Pam is the office mattress.Angela
- Permalink: It's not a surprise to me. Pam is the office mattress.