Michael: [looking at hotel bed under black light] Whoa, what are all those stains?
Dwight: Blood, urine or semen.
Michael: Oh god, I hope it's urine.

Dwight: (sees Jerome Bettis) Why do they call him The Bus?
Michael: Because he's afraid to fly.

Michael: Guess where I am going? I'll give you a hint: It is a booze-fueled sex romp where anything goes. You are correct, sir! I'm headed to Philadelphia for the Annual Northeastern Mid-market Office Supply Convention!

Jan. I can't be on top of you 24 hours a day, Michael.

Jan: I guess I underestimated you.
Michael: Yeah, well, maybe next time, you will... estimate me.

Phyllis: [to Pam] You should order the most expensive thing on the menu, so he knows you're worth it.
Stanley: If you do that, you're gonna have to put out.
Phyllis: Oh yeah, you'll have to put out.

Oh my god! Dwight got a hooker! Oh my god, I gotta call... I gotta call somebody. I don't know who to call... Dwight got a HOOKER!

Jim

I love inside jokes... I'd love to be a part of one someday.

Michael

Ain't no party like a Scranton party, 'cause a Scranton party don't stop!

Michael

It's like with firemen. You don't leave your brothers behind. Even if you find out that there is a better fire in Connecticut.

Michael

[referring to Angela, to longtime co-worker Meredith] Andrea is the office bitch. You'll get used to her. [extends hand] Creed.

Creed

In the Martin family, we like to say, "Looks like someone took the slow train from Philly." That's code for "check out the slut." [swats at a fly] Why are there flies in here?

Angela
Displaying all 12 quotes

The Office Season 3 Episode 2 Quotes

[referring to Angela, to longtime co-worker Meredith] Andrea is the office bitch. You'll get used to her. [extends hand] Creed.

Creed

In the Martin family, we like to say, "Looks like someone took the slow train from Philly." That's code for "check out the slut." [swats at a fly] Why are there flies in here?

Angela
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