The Office Season 5 Quotes
Ryan: Okay, so you are not going to reveal in any way that we're broke.
Michael: Of course not.
Ryan: That we're having any problem at all.
Michael: Nope, nope, nope.
Pam: Just to reiterate, none of us is going to say anything that might indicate that we are going broke.
Michael: Right, right. There is no way in hell that I am going to say that we're broke.
- Permalink: Okay, so you are not going to reveal in any way that we're broke...
Jim: Now, this is the projection over three months?
Charles: We still have the inventory sitting-- [everyone starts chattering at once]
Dwight: Let me float something out there, okay? Can I just say-- can I say something?
David: Yeah, yeah.
Dwight: There is a hive of bees outside the front door. We kidnap the queen, extract her alarm pheromones, place them on a flushable wipe, put that in his bathroom.
David: I can't believe I'm about to say this, but the cheapest option... is to make Michael an offer.
Charles: Yes. Yes, I was gonna say the same thing. We should buy him out.
Jim: Oh, but you didn't.
Dwight: Oh, Man! If only Michael had children. That's how you really apply the pressure.
Charles: What is wrong with you?
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Michael: Did I ever tell you about the day that Steve Martin died?
Pam: Steve Martin's not dead, Michael.
Michael: I know. But I always thought that the day that he died would be the worst day of my life. I was wrong. It's this.
- Permalink: Did I ever tell you about the day that Steve Martin died? Stev...
Jim : You're just out of business?
Pam: We have maybe a month. I don't know what I'm gonna do.
Jim: Oh, yeah, well don't worry about it. We'll figure it out. We'll be okay.
Pam: That's what Michael said.
- Permalink: You're just out of business? We have maybe a month. I don't kn...
Jim: Now, would corporate approve a temporary price reduction for returning customers?
Charles: God, no.
Dwight: Stupid. Yeah, makes us look weak.
Charles: I agree.
Dwight: I say we fill Michael's office with bees. My apiarist owes me a favor.
Jim: Really? Does he do good work?
- Permalink: Now, would corporate approve a temporary price reduction for ret...
When a child gets behind the wheel of a car and runs into a tree, You don't blame the child. He didn't know any better. You blame the 30-year-old woman who got in the passenger seat and said, "Drive, kid. I trust you."Pam
- Permalink: When a child gets behind the wheel of a car and runs into a tree...
Hi, Jerry. Michael Scott. Well, this is slightly embarrassing. Um, I'm going to have to... ask you to pay me a little bit more money for that delivery we dropped off yesterday. Yeah. We did. We got the check, but we're just going to need a much, much bigger check.Michael
- Permalink: Hi, Jerry. Michael Scott. Well, this is slightly embarrassing. U...
Michael: How much can we afford to pay a delivery guy?
Financial Guy: Well, if these numbers you gave me are correct--
Michael: They are correct, sir.
Financial Guy: Then you can't afford to pay him anything.
Michael: Okay. A lame attempt at humor. Swing and a miss.
Financial Guy: Your prices are too low.
Michael: Lowest in town.
Financial Guy: Why do you think Staples and Dunder Mifflin can't match your prices?
Pam: Corporate greed?
Ryan: Look, our price model is fine. I reviewed the numbers myself. Over time with enough volume, we become profitable.
Financial Guy: Yeah, with a fixed cost pricing model that's correct.
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David Wallace: Would you let Charles know that David is here, please? Jim, hey.
Jim: Hey, David.
Dwight: David Wallace! Hello, we've been expecting you, David Wallace. Charles and I were waiting for you.
Charles: There he is. There he is. How was the trip up?
David: A lot better than a month at the Scranton Radisson, I'm sure.
Charles: Oh, you know it hasn't been that bad. Hasn't been that bad. These people are the salt of the earth down here. You couldn't ask for a better way to learn a company.
Charles: I feel like I should be thanking you.
- Permalink: Would you let Charles know that David is here, please? Jim, hey....