I can think like Michael. Alright, I'm deep below the ocean's surface in a submarine. A torpedo is coming right at me...No! Damn it! That's just my own imagination.

Dwight

Is that a palm tree or did Gabe get skinnier? Either way, let's pee on it.

Gabe [reading]

He answers to Michael, Michael G. Scott, Michael J. Fox, Mr. Fox, The Incredible Mr. Fox...

Erin

You drive. I got a car full of fox meat.

Dwight

Problem solved everyone. Space Orphan and Princess Nincumpoop are off to rescue Michael.

Dwight

Pam: Got it. I will put out an A.P.B. Otherwise known as an Ask Pam Beasley...Did the phone cut out?
Jim: Nope.

I'm upset. My bladder is full. There is no telling what I might do right now, all over the inside of your precious little car.

Michael

Her personality is like a three. Her sense of humor is a two. Her ears are like a seven, and a four. Add it all up and what do you get? 16. And he treats her like she's a perfect forty.

Erin

Why does the Sun rise in the morning? Why do magnets stick together? Because everybody says so. Everybody.

Michael

Ryan: I don't wanna be married until everyone can be married.
Oscar: You know what Ryan? I talked to the other gay guys, and we're okay with it. We all agreed it's fine for you to get married.

Where's your jet pack, Zuckerburg?

Tom [to Jim]

Two eyes, two ears, a chine, a mouth, 10 fingers, two nipples, a butt, two kneecaps, a penis. I have just described to you the Lochness Monster, and the reward for its capture...all the riches in Scotland. So I have one question, why are you her

Creed
Displaying quotes 181 - 192 of 349 in total

The Office Season 7 Quotes

Stanley just drank OJ out of my mug and didn't seem to realize that it wasn't his hot coffee. So the question has to be asked, is there no limit to what he won't notice?

Jim

In the end, the greatest snowball isn't a snowball at all...it's fear. Merry Christmas.

Dwight
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