Favorite The Simpsons Quotes
Ralph: What's a battle?
Principal Skinner: Hahahaha, lets go.
Superintendent Chalmers: Did that boy say what's a battle?
Principal Skinner: No he said What's that rattle, it's about the heating duct.
Superintendent Chalmers: Hmm, it sounded like battle.
Principal Skinner: I've had a cold, so--
Superintendent Chalmers: Oh so you hear r's as b's?
I like to cry at the ocean, because only there do my tears seem small.</i> Nelson
I didn't get anybody pregnant. I didn't Facebook a kid to death. Make with my dirt bike!Bart
Selma: What a cheap date.
Moe: I'm not cheap baby. I'm embarrassed to be seen with you. There's a big difference.
Marge: A lot of people sound like Sideshow Bob. Like Frasier on Cheers.
Homer: Or Frasier on Fraiser.
Marge: Or Lt. Cmdr. Tom Dodge in Down Periscope.
That school is so great. Teachers teach so much better when they're paid in money and not chickens.Lisa
Patty: I can't believe Aunt Gladys is really gone.
Selma: Her legend will live forever.
Homer's Brain: Yeah. The legend of the dog-faced woman.
Homer: Legend of the dog-faced woman! Oh, that's good!
Son, a woman is a lot like a... a refrigerator! They're about six feet tall, 300 pounds. They make ice, and um Oh, wait a minute! Actually, a woman is more like a beer. They smell good, they look good, you'd step over your own mother just to get one! But you can't stop at one, you wanna drink another woman!Homer
Marge: Why don't you take this potato? It's pretty big.
Bart: Mom, you're always trying to give me potatoes. What is it with you?
Marge: I just think they're neat.
I'll be Gus, the lovable chimney-sweep. Clean as a whistle, sharp as a thistle, best in all Westminster.Bart
If Jesus had a gun, he'd be alive today.Homer
Corey: Hi, you've reached the Corey hot-line. $4.95 a minute. Here are some words that rhyme with Corey: gory, story, allegory, montessori...